importing guinness

Starting over

2010-01-21T11:49:00.001-08:00

I just noticed the date of my last blog entry. March 2009. Sh1t! A lot has happened since then.
Like everyone else, I jumped ship and went over to FB. Since then, I've given up on FB (except for a daily visit to comment and view people's photos and play Chug IT with my friend that won't quit! LOL). It was not feeling very personal to me and I had stopped checking in with my real friends - writing emails to really get to the heart of my good friends, or calling to see how they were doing. Not that blogging really goes there either. And frankly, no one is probably reading this blog anymore as they've all gone over to FB too. No worries though. I will write for myself. :)

It's been a busy year! We sold our house in May, moved to CA, moved again in CA, settled in, traveled to Ireland, put an offer on a house here that we are waiting to hear back on. It's a short sale so we are waiting a loooonnnnnng time but that's okay because our lease isn't up until June. Still, I look forward to a little more space and hopefully making a few more friends in our neighborhood.

It's been a great move for us, to be closer to my parents who are only 40 minutes away. We see them almost weekly, either us there or them out here now that the weather has gotten cooler. They won't come out in the summer, which is okay because we are usually going to the beach which is closer to them! Can you believe that? To the beach?! We were there on Thanksgiving - Emer was digging in the sand, it was lovely. I'm constantly feeling blessed by the lovely weather down here...

Well, til the last 4 days. We've been in a drenching downpour that seems to be lasting 40 days and 40 nights. As bad as anything I've seen in Seattle, probably worse. Again, so blessed to not have to go out to work in it... Yay! That's all for now. Hears hoping I have more interesting things to say in the future!

A week like no other.

2009-03-20T13:08:00.000-07:00

This photo is probably too small but I'm not downloading to my laptop anymore so i have to take what i can get. E smiling with her daddy. I love this photo! I think it may be the first time she picked out a dress to wear. That is not my kid!

So, we are going on the end of week one on our own. Two girls and a dog. It's been interesting to say the least. Mostly I've noticed that it's hard on your own. Not impossible, just harder. M is usually the one who gets up when the little Miss cries in the night. Or we both lay there hoping the other will get her and she falls back to sleep in the meanwhile. But now, since I am the only one and usually woken from a very sound sleep, I get up to get her out of sheer confusion! For a couple nights, she's woken up very early and asked for "cheese". I try to tell her it's not time to get up yet but that doesn't seem to fly. I don't know why! LOL Needless to say, I've been tired most of the time. I guess it's because I haven't worked out either. I really need to get back into that.

So M left last Friday morning and E and I had plans Friday and Saturday night. Our Sunday morning play date was canceled due to weather so Sunday was a very long day inside. Don't ask me why I didn't just pack her up in the car and drive to the mall so she could run around. It didn't even cross my mind that I could "go" somewhere. LOL Monday night we went to a play date/dinner with friends, Tuesday had a St Patrick's Day party with moms/kids, Wednesday two friends came over for leftovers... whew! Yesterday we stayed home and rested. Tonight again, same plan. I think I may have overbooked early in the week. :) This weekend I'll have help from a visiting friend and then M is home on Tuesday night. It should go smoothly. Now that I've said that, though, I guess I've opened myself up for all sorts of mayhem.

I've noticed a couple of interesting things lately, and I have to figure out how to handle them. Since E is an only child and probably will be, and as well she goes to daycare, she's never learned how to "fight" for toys. At home, she doesn't have to share usually. At daycare, all she gets to do is share. When we go out to other kids houses', I've noticed that she looks at me or comes to get me whenever another kid takes what she was playing with. My guess is that she expects me to handle things like the daycare teachers, who probably push sharing and/or give the toy back to the kid that was playing with it. Whatever that is. I usually tell her that things are a little different when we are at people's house, she can either wait for the item to be available again or she can push the kid when he tries to take the toy. I don't care. I don't want her to be a bully but I don't want her to not do anything (or expect me to do something). I guess it's a new situation that we need to work out. I want to support her without her thinking that I need to 'save' her. Sometimes we don't get what we want but sometimes we have to fight too. It's hard to know how to handle it. At least, it is for me. Maybe with a few more evenings like that, she might get it...

The opposite of that is that when the kids are at our house, she is a REALLY good sharer. I've never seen her take a toy away from another kid who is visiting our house. Maybe it's not a good sharer but too timid to do something, I don't know. I don't want to put her in a box. I just know that she seems pretty open when kids play with her stuff. Along with that, we had about 6 kids over on Tuesday night with ages ranging from 18 months - 5 yrs old. All of them were downstairs playing and E was upstairs with the moms, playing by herself. She would go to the stairs every now and then and check out what they were doing but then would come right back up and keep playing. She had no interest. Although the next morning, she did ask me where the kids went.

In many ways, I am seeing her like me. She likes the company of few. A lot of people seem to turn her off unless it's a lot of familiar people. I suppose being in daycare all day would make you want to be alone when you got home. I know it would if I were in a daycare all day!

Ok, as long as I am babbling on about E, I thought I'd share one last thing because I find it funny. Maybe you'd have to hear her to think it's as funny as I do. She had one little friend, I think it's a stuffed lamb or something, but we call him Ted (all the bears are Ted too). This little Ted gets in trouble ALL the time and has to go to time outs. Then after the time out, she turns to him, picks him up and holds him to her and says "Oh, honey, it's alright" only it sounds more like "Oh hohney, it's alright" and I am convinced it's one of the daycare workers that talks like that. The way she says that is not like we talk. I'll have to try and record it in a video. (Ted is constantly getting in trouble for biting, I don't know why. ;))

Anyhow, now that I have sufficiently bored you, I'm going to sign off and take a nap.

Takin' it day by day

2009-03-03T12:16:00.000-08:00

So after my whiny post last week, I got my butt off the couch and started making some plans. I mean, you can't meet anyone if you aren't getting out and if I can conveniently use my child as an excuse to get together with other mothers then so be it. We actually had 2 play dates, one ice cream event and also a Mother's Night out with the mom's group I joined. Who knew there were nice people out there? I didn't (well, I had an idea but, boy in our neighborhood, they are hard to find). It's helps to have a little social interaction - just enough to make me happy and still talk to people about things I have no clue about. Did you know that toddlers have to be potty trained? Yes, it's true. Here I thought one day they just figured it out. I know I did. ;) How do you potty train a toddler? Yes, I'm learning how. TG for our daycare admin because I certainly wouldn't know anything. LOL

Anyhow, I'm feeling better. M is probably stressed more than ever. He's planning for a trip home for a nice break with friends and family but since we are putting our house up for sale in April (hopefully) he also has a lot of little jobs that have been waiting for his attention. Our downstairs bathroom, now finished. All the little odds and ends, completed. Gosh, it feels good and I didn't even do it. It just took a deadline and a lot of pressure for him but he's marching through it. He leaves in 2 weeks - we have a lot to do before then.

The past weekend I got to feel like how it feels for people who shake/abuse/abandon their children (I'm sure some search is going to come up and CPS will be on my doorstep in a moment). I would never do that physical damage but I can clearly see how someone could be at the end of their rope, desperate for some kind of divine intervention but not receiving it. I don't know what happened... sometimes we just have bad days... my patience was thin... her need to test it was great, I guess. Specifically at one point we were in the car, M driving and E was calling "Mama" from the backseat. I usually answer her, thinking more is coming, and it does not. I say "yes" she says "mama" again. After the 20th time, I stop answering (no one said I was quick). Then she moves on to asking for a cracker. "well honey, I don't have any crackers in the car today". She asks again, I answer again. Her whiny voice asks again and I don't know how many times this is but I told you I didn't have an f-ing cracker stop f-ing asking me for one! Of course, I didn't put it like this but my raised voice and my stink eye implied this. She was quiet for about a millisecond and then "cracker" was heard from the back seat. Needless to say, it moved downhill from there and once home, eventually earned her some "time alone" in her bedroom. Sometimes... Sometimes, I don't think I'm cut out for this.

And then, the cutest smile, the cheesiest grin, the hug. Sucker for punishment, I am. How do people cope with more than one?

Feeling a little boring...

2009-02-19T15:49:00.000-08:00

I haven't written much lately because... well, frankly... I'm feeling a little boring. My weight loss isn't going the direction I'd like it and I'm cold. Bah!

It has been the most beautiful winter (barring that awful snow and minor snow episodes since) with sunshine and/or no rain. I can live like this. I still want warm sun on a daily basis but it could be much, much worse.

Things to babble about this month. I had a minor meltdown a few weeks back. Anyone who knows me, knows I need time alone. Well, I also need time with people. People other than my husband and child and people who actually 'get' me and well, that I consider a close friend. I don't have that in Seattle. It's hard enough to have that and try to have a life with your family. It means cutting precious time out of the couple hours that you have with your daughter on a weekend evening, or working out some way to meet on a weekend where you aren't making your husband (who never goes out or takes time for himself with friends) watch your child in an unfair imbalance of parental duties. It means getting over guilt for being away from your kid during the only hours she's home. It means getting over guilt of wishing they would both go out for a few hours and let me hang out in the house alone with my thoughts on a non-working day. Anyhow, I'm still struggling with that guilt and hopefully that part of it will work itself out in due time. But all of those things would be less of an issue if I had at least one close friend in the same or very similar situation in life - small toddler, working mom - who didn't have a hundred other commitments (family members and a whole host of friends they met in college who fit the same situation in life they have) where they actually might welcome my friendship. LOL I'm a quirk of nature at best... I don't like shopping, prefer to take a walk or sit and have a glass of wine. I would get a pedicure but not into manicures, I'd love a work out partner but I'd just go out to lunch if that is all that was available. I would bring my kid sometimes and our kids would play so we could have a chat, rather going through the whole getting-to-know you bullshit. God, I'm tired of "getting-to-know-you", I just want my friends. Funny, just typing this, I am getting sad again. I don't cry often, almost never these days, but the day that this originally came up for me, I could not stop. Now it's bringing tears to my eyes again. Obviously I have hit that nerve. All the other days I push it back and when I think about it, all these feelings come up again. Sigh..

We drive around from place to place looking for a new home, every weekend we do this. We want good schools, bigger house (not too big), new would be nice but not necessary, garden bigger than a postage stamp, people in our socio-economic/small child period of life. I am starting to realize that this.is.impossible. We can't afford it. We can't find it. West Seattle is not it. People are so hard to KNOW here. All those people who say they find Seattle friendly and have met great friends must not require much out of their friends. I am actually calling "friends" of people I see once every 4 months just so I can say I have some friends these days. LOL I actually suggested to M that we move back to Ireland. At the very least, we'd have his family nearby (even a 4 hour drive is nearby to me) and a few friends in our situation. One of my best friends lives there now and is trying to get pregnant. It would be perfect or maybe not but I am desperate. I am sad. Crazy, I know. And now you all know too. :)

Ok, just so this isn't a huge downer, I have a few E stories. This weekend we went for a lovely walk around a lake. At the end of it, I was trying to get E to the car and she was having none of it. She was playing ring-around-the-rosie with a tree since her mother wouldn't do it. I must've been 40 -50 feet away from her, just watching her. I think I was thinking it was the farthest I've ever been from her and she did not come to me (I noticed people looking at her and I thought they must be wondering 'where is her mother?' but I could be wrong) and in fact, she walked towards some other people who were playing frisbee. After about 10 minutes, she looked at me like she finally saw me - WAY OVER THERE - and came trotting over to me. It was that moment I could see my future. I wish I could say that I am completely present for every moment she is with me and that I know our time is short in this world, in this time of our relationship, but I'm not. Sometimes I need to stare blindly off into space or I ask her to read to herself because I have a headache. But at that moment, I realized that I should try harder to be present because it's going to be gone tomorrow. Wait, did I say this wasn't going to be downer? Suddenly it took a turn! lol

You know, I have normal photos of my child but I like the ones with her cheesy grin, I find it hilarious because she can be hilarious. She had just gotten this new haircut and if you ever want to feel like a shit, take your small child to get her haircut. She cried before we even got in the chair. It didn't help that when we got in the chair, the girl sprayed her hair with water like right.in.her.face! Beeeyotch! Are you trying to make it worse? Anyhow, I guess that's why they call it Budg3t Cuts. You don't get the customer service like the other place. On the plus side, it was open on Monday and we had a day off. Fortunately, we ended on a good note. E seemed to like her haircut (even though she looks like Buster Brown) and she got a piece of chocolate from the nice torturer.. I mean stylist lady.

a new era

2009-01-22T13:56:00.000-08:00

It's funny but even the cynic that I can sometimes be (thanks in part to a cynical hubby) is filled with hope over our new president. He may end up sucking like the last one but at least his speaking skills will not become fodder for The Daily Show. We won't have to endure any more smirks that make us think that he doesn't really believe what he's saying so why should we? Anyhow, it's over, so I don't think I'll dwell it. We watched the inauguration on Tuesday like a lot of other people and we prepared E for the big day. Of course, since then, anyone who's on the TV is called Obama. So maybe she doesn't really know who he is specifically. ;)

Along with the new administration, I'm back on the WW bandwagon. A little less intensely than the last time but still in hopes to keep things in check. I gained 3.5 pounds over the holiday and I'm sure that not working out has shifted things in the downward direction a bit. This week I was back down 4 pounds, just for keeping track of what I was eating. I'm sure we all know where this will go next week! Rather than 5 days a week at the gym, I'm working on a more relaxing schedule... more walks in the evening with the whole family (we go whenever it's not raining) and this week I've even incorporated a few workouts at the gym. My goal is to drag my butt out of my warm toasty bed into the cold dark air of the house and make it to the gym only 2 mornings a week! That's not bad. However, that's been my goal since I returned from CA and I haven't been there once yet. It does not help that I put a blanket over the window and it's even darker in the morning than it was!

Ever since we returned from vaca, I can't get the kid to sleep in a bed for love nor money. For the last week, the poor thing has been sleeping on the floor, on her sleeping bag, behind her closed door (which we had to close otherwise she would get out of bed for an hour each night after we said goodnight), her little face peeking under the crack in the door. I wish I could get a photo but I can't. I feel, and I'm sure M will agree, like horrible parents but we have tried all angles. At the end of the day, we are the parents and we set the boundaries. We need to suffer the crying of our child so that she will sleep better (she actually sleeps really well on the floor and wakes up happy) and so we will. I can't wait to see how it is when we go and return from Ireland next year.

Well, I know I'm cutting this off but if I don't post it now, I'll forget until it's 2011... Talk with you cats later. :)

Quiet times

2009-01-06T15:29:00.000-08:00

It's been a whirlwind of a month and if you are on Facebook, you already know all this. Plus if you watch the news, you probably know that we had the worst snowstorm in a few years right before Christmas. We loved seeing the snow fall the first day, we walked every day we could and we even went sledding down our hill. I guess that was the only advantage to living on a hill in a bad snowstorm... sledding was good and very close to home. Our deck had about a foot and a half of snow. The girl was home every.day. And I found out the disadvantage of working from home! You don't get to take snow days! What! Just because I don't drive to work doesn't mean I shouldn't get to enjoy a bit of fun like everyone else.... But no, I had to work and E was home the whole time. It was challenging to say the least. It certainly makes me appreciate stay-at-home moms even more than they can spend the whole day with their kids. Every day. Anyhow, this photo was taken when M went to the store with E in the sled and on his way back, she dozed off. It was too cute so we sent it to our local area blog and she made the front page briefly before she was kicked off by yet more snow coverage.

So, the week leading up to Christmas was very uneventful in our lives, just slow torture where you could not really get out of the house and/or your child did not want to walk in the snow so you either had to carry her everywhere or stay inside. We thought briefly that we would not be able to fly to So Cal for Christmas but at the last moment, we got a break and our neighbor agreed to drive us. I only have two photos of the girl from Christmas, that were taken on a Fl1p video camera... forgive me the crappy shot.

Oh, and to add to that great list of December 2008 items, I've probably gained back 10 pounds! WAH!

ElfYourself

2008-12-08T13:52:00.001-08:00

Send your own ElfYourself eCards

I think this is about the funnest thing to do that is legal. Go to the website, upload a few photos and pick your dance. It's hilarious.

Trick-or-treat and birthday wishes

2008-11-07T10:55:00.000-08:00

Last week was a busy one. Halloween popped up, seemingly out of nowhere in my book, and even faster, E's second birthday.

As her parents, M and I were actually somewhat organized, probably because we didn't arrange a party for her. Parties for two year olds? Well, family comes to mind as the crowd that you invite to a 2 yr old's gig and since we don't have any here, we decided to stick with the 3 of us. Worked better for me, as I am not the world's greatest organizer. I have visions of botched birthday parties and missing bits of Halloween costumes and unpurchased birthday gifts for those little girl birthday's she will undoubtedly go to.... Eek!

Anyhow, Halloween went without a hitch. It was still dark when we put on her costume and the "hood" lasted about 10 minutes before it came off. We had to put it back on and bribe the child finally so we could get a few photos. You'll see the form of bribery in the photos no doubt. Here's the lot of them, there are quite a few, be forewarned!

Trick-or-treating did not take long to explain. The neighborhood near our daycare had a sponsored events - all the businesses handed out candy to the trick-or-treaters from 3-6pm. Although it had rained cats and dogs all day, somehow when it was time to pick up E, the clouds parted and the sun shone down on the lot of us. It was a nice evening! We walked around with all the other kids and got candy from people waiting to give us candy. I did try to teach good manners - say "Thank you" although it's more like "Tn do" so no one really knew it was thank you but us. At least she said it a few times! One time she actually got to select her own candy (rather than the person handing it to her) and there was definitely some thought process going on behind the piece she chose because she moved a few pieces around to get the one she wanted!
As a parent, I love to see that stuff. It just lets you know they are becoming their own little person! After about an hour of walking, well, me carrying, we went to see a friend who wanted to see E's costume and she got a lot more candy. Finally we stopped at another friend's house and helped them hand out candy. It was a good night! She definitely enjoyed the night, I think.

The next day we woke early, unfortunately, but it was E's birthday and there were presents to open! She got some cute gifts from abroad and then our gift, which was a trike. More photos here. We also went to IHOP and got the smiley face pancake with ice cream for dessert (yes, at 10am!). We opened another present and got a couple balloons from IHOP and spent the rest of the day recovering from the onslaught of sugar in the morning. I think she liked it her day!

Sunday was another lovely birthday celebration with our friends that we handed out candy with and Monday she had a little birthday party at daycare replete with ice cream and a crown. Needless to say, we are still coming OFF that 4 day sugar binge!! But it's all good.

She is definitely TWO now. It seems the switch has switched. ;) More about that later.

TGIF

2008-10-24T10:04:00.001-07:00

You would think from that title that this post is going to be something about Friday but that would imply that I plan out what I'm going to say. I don't. I have such a hard time coming up with titles, that just seemed like the easiest thing to say! (It's now Tuesday and I'm still working on this post!)

Last week(now two weeks ago) was a lovely one. My parents were visiting and spending quality time with their granddaughter. It was nice to see. E is talking a lot now and repeating words (note to self: watch the F-word) so we got her to practice "Nana" (easier than grandma) and "Granddad" and my parents loved it. She was only shy with them for a few minutes and pretty soon was all over my dad. E has a thing for men. She does. My pop-psychology brain says it's because she's around women all day at school. Anyhow, she goes after all the dads. Flirts, etc. Anyhow, that was great - we told her to practice saying "Granddad, $10?" but she wouldn't bite. Maybe at Christmas!

I'm still going on WW. You may have noticed that I've stopped writing about my losses. That's because I'm stuck around the 158lb mark. I really need to start tracking my food again, with guests visiting and a couple of "date" nights, I wasn't keeping great track which means I was probably going way over. Now, 5 days after I originally started posting this, I'm way off track. Tack on a cold and no workouts, eating comfort food and trying to feel better and I'm sure I've gone overboard. It's amazing how it only takes a few days to start feeling like a slug and actually enjoying sleeping in. I really have to keep up with the workouts and running to keep my weight down. Something about this time of year though - getting ready to cover up and be cold all year just tends to make me want to put on a layer... of fat. ;)

I am totally bummed because I had to miss seeing G when she was in town last weekend. I swear if I wasn't such a happy person these days, I'd think the world was conspiring against me that I didn't get to meet G, Ang and RG at The Melting Pot for dinner. I love fondue and I love those ladies and its just the pits that I got a cold. Seems we've all got it. First E, then me and now M. I want to get healthy fast, if nothing so that I can play with girl. It's so hard to do anything with a sinus headache! Hopefully one more day of recovery and I can get back to the gym too.

Not much going on here lately. Getting ready (which means at least we are aware of it) for E's birthday on Saturday. No parties because it doesn't really make sense for a 2 yr old to have a party, although there will be plenty of gatherings no doubt and we'll make her feel like a princess on her day... now if I can just get her to say "Two" when I ask how old she'll be on her birthday. I'm sure that will arrive sooner than I think.

Bye for now.

Results.. for now

2008-10-07T10:39:00.000-07:00

I had an incredibly hard time finding very many "before" photos that would show exactly what I needed to show. I covered up well so it just looks like I'm frumpy rather than fat. And frankly, the "after" photos don't really make me look all that trim in my opinion but maybe I'm being hard on myself... Fact of the matter is that I will never be a size 6. Ever. As M likes to say, 'get a ladder and get over it!'

First before photo is Christmas Eve 2007 and really shows off my post-baby belly (way post baby, she was a year old here). Second photo, sometime before that, just me looking frumpy. Too show off, because I don't get to brag too often and most people don't see my stomach anyway, I'm putting up two "after"shots. Me in my way-too-expensive 7 jeans and my ever flattening tummy. I'm pretty proud of it, I must say. ;)

Before:

Look at that tummy, how unflattering!

After:

BTW, I am still on WW, I just haven't gotten below 158. It's been up and down for 2 months now. My MO with weight loss is the same. Lose it and get comfy and eat again. It just can't be done. ;)

No surprise really...

2008-10-06T11:51:00.000-07:00

Your result for The Perception Personality Image Test...

NBPC - The Daydreamer

Nature, Background, Big Picture, and Color

You perceive the world with particular attention to nature. You focus on the hidden treasures of life (the background) and how that fits into the larger picture. You are also particularly drawn towards the colors around you. Because of the value you place on nature, you tend to find comfort in more subdued settings and find energy in solitude. You like to ponder ideas and imagine the many possibilities of your life without worrying about the details or specifics. You are in tune with all that is around you and understand your life as part of a larger whole. You are a down-to-earth person who enjoys going with the flow.

Isn't that a gorgeous photo?

BTW, I had M do this as well and after grumbling about how absolutely stupid it was, he did. He got almost the total opposite of what I did. I laughed when he told me he was "The Humanitarian".... yeah, right. ;)

Too lazy to write?

2008-09-22T11:45:00.000-07:00

There's kind of a lot going on these days and although it is exciting for me, I don't know how exciting it will be for you.

Biggest news, I suppose, is appearing in the post below. Cute as a button, we got ourselves a new family member. Cara is our new dog, almost 2 yr old black Lab that is as sweet as pie and fairly well-trained even. We had been looking but no decisions had been made - since M had his heart set on a white golden retriever like he used to have. Finally one day, M decided we could stop by a shelter on our way home from camping. We came close to a golden retriever but it had a few more problems than we were ready to deal with. Then we went to a lottery for 2 puppies available in a town nearby. We were one of two people who put our names in for one puppy and still didn't get it! Obviously, it wasn't meant to be. So we had put off thinking about it for a couple days until M (who was also looking for a used SUV) found the vehicle he was looking for on cra1gsl1st and we decided to head down to P0rtland to have a look. We stopped at the 0reg0n Human3 Soc13ty and found Cara. Oh, we bought the truck too. M had to go back during the week to pick up the dog. So she's almost been with us a week and she's great! E keeps calling her "Bella" which is the name of our friend's dog (who is also a black Lab). She doesn't realize (I don't think) that's it's a different dog. I keep saying "it's Cara" but she keeps saying "Bella, bella, bella" all the freakin' time! There's no hope and I'm thinking we might have to change the dog's name to Bella. LOL

A week ago I had my first ever mammogram. It took about 5 minutes, which basically means it took me longer to drive over to the clinic than to be seen by the tech doing it. I'd heard all sorts of stories about what it feels like and yes, as a matter of fact, it does feel like placing your boob between to steel plates and pressing them together. Fortunately for us mostly boob-less population, it wasn't too bad. I will find out the results in a week or so.

That same day I had scheduled my flight - the instruction that M got me for a birthday present. He drove me over to the local airport (not the international but a littler one that we can see from the freeway when we drive that way) and I met up with my instructor. Do you remember ever having a dream, something you've always wanted to do but as the years pass and it sits on the back burner, it truly didn't seem like something you always wanted to do? Like you've forgotten how much you wanted to do it? That's what flying is like. I always wanted to fly a plane. It seemed so out of reach, cost wise, I don't know I just never thought of doing it for myself.... Anyhow, I was reminded of it when we were taking off from that little airport in the 4-seater DA40 plane. The talk from the tower was Japanese, I hadn't a clue who or what they were talking to but I tried. I concentrated but it was definitely not to be. Fortunately, my instructor knew and we took off to the north and flew over Seattle on the gorgeous sunny day that it was. It was a perfect day. As we turned to the east, I could see my 'hood to my left, ferries down below, and the Pug3t S0und out in the distance, I don't know if I'd even seen it look so beautiful. When he actually let me "take the wheel" and I turned and dipped the plane a bit, oh my god, what a rush! A bit like driving for the first time, where you know you are behind the wheel of a powerful vehicle but you still have to find out what it can do. Scary and exhilarating all at once! The flight was only an hour but definitely the best way to see our city on a beautiful day. Who knows if I will take lessons - just not ready to give up that much time with E right now? But it's definitely on my mind and maybe in my future! :) Oh, did I mention that he let me land the plane as well?! Eep!

Our new addition

2008-09-18T15:31:00.000-07:00

Don't have time to say much but meet Cara!

Happy Labor Day!

2008-09-01T13:37:00.000-07:00

I haven't written lately. I've been busy. Working even. ;) I'm a big procrastinator when it comes to work projects - not enough daily satisfaction to sit well with me. I've had a looming project, I've slowly been working on and I've now moved into the most challenging part - coordinating cable broadband installation in an area where we have limited support but really need it. The cable company will only bring the cable to the offices and at that point, we have to network our office computers. Having the office employees do this would be next to impossible, having me travel down there to do it would be painful.... So, I'm working on coordination... I've got the contracts signed and am now waiting for the installations to take place. It's been keeping me busy.

This weekend has been a challenge. I have the munchies, a sick husband and a child that also wasn't feeling great/napping for the last few days. I've let myself eat a bit even though I went to yoga today and only burned 100 calories! Why does the class feel so hard yet you don't burn anything?! It was relaxing and I needed that too. I'm up to 30 minutes of running in my 5k training - the run is at the end of September and I'm fairly sure I will be ready. After that, I think I will set my sights on a 10k (it's been a few years since I've run one). I don't know if I can train for a 10k on the treadmill so I may have to move it outdoors - which at 5:30am is not going to be easy. Brr!

I've had a challenging weekend with the girl. I think I've mentioned before that I find it hard when she's sick. She's more demanding and needy of me. Yes, I know she is my child. But that doesn't mean I have to handle it gracefully each time she needs me more than normal... I'm only human! :) Anyhow, because she wasn't feeling well, she hasn't been eating much - it's normal, I've seen this before. She is going through a phase where she wants to open the fridge, pull herself up on the bottom step and stand there indefinitely, then ask for something that eventually she eats two bites of and hands back to me. Usually she eats like there is no tomorrow. Anyhow, getting used to the change always takes me awhile and then once I get used to her eating little bites, she's usually fine and eating again.... I know, my problem, not hers. :) I also know she's not well because I could not put her down for a nap yesterday -she cried or talked for over an hour- before we decided to go and look at an open house. She had a lot of energy, running around and having fun in the empty houses, only to fall asleep for almost 2 hours after we got back in the car. She was zonked. And still went to bed last night... I think she is getting a tooth (or two or four) - not sure. I was hoping to her move into her big girl bed this past weekend but with being sick.... well, it just doesn't seem like the right time. We have to kind of hurry though - the crib belongs to a friend whose brother is having a baby either in late Sept or October, I can't remember which.

I'm still managing to lose a bit of weight even though I haven't been right on plan (in fact, I've recently exceeded my alloted food points for the week the past 3 or 4 weeks) but with working out, I manage to stay even. I really have to be organized and sometimes that can be hard... now that the fruit season is starting to fade too - the blueberries taste a bit crappier and the strawberries get furry a lot faster than they were.... fortunately, I've been okay with vegetables and keeping my meals smaller. I made a mean green curry chicken dish - a recipe that I got from ww - although it needed a bit of red chili paste to make it the way I like it - spicy. Still the flavor wasn't bad!

We have one last summer camping trip next weekend, provided that this sh1tty weather we've been having improves a bit. We are going to Deception Pass State Park again - we were there a few weeks ago and had a lovely weekend and pretty nice weather. E truly seems to love camping and we finally have our bikes working and were able to take advantage of them around the campsite. I honestly can't wait until E is old enough to ride her own bike and play with the other kids in the campground... I wish I could say that it would be nice for her to have a sibling to play with but we all know that ain't going to happen. But, suffice it to say that I contemplate it a lot more than I have in the past two years. We better hurry and get a dog, is all I can say!

I'll leave you with a few memories of our last trip...

Building a fire with dad:

Practicing our "Cheese" for photos:

A shot with Deception Pass bridge in the background:

Two posts in one week!

2008-08-13T15:05:00.000-07:00

We need help. As you may remember, we had given up hope on remodeling our current house and had instead been looking for a new-to-us house in a more 'family friendly' neighborhood. Recently, a few events occurred - SUMMER, for one - that have caused us to reconsider. lol Also, we had a Bl0ck Party and met a group of our neighbors and realized that there are a lot more kids in this 'hood than we ever would have guessed. SO, we've gone back to talking about popping the top. The dilemma being cost vs. satisfaction given. I am attaching a series of photos - a before and after if you will - and we want you to judge for yourself. The first shot is a view from our current deck level. The second shot will be a view from a ladder at roof level. Not quite as high it would be (since I wasn't actually standing on the roof) but fairly close.

Looking northwest, from deck:

Looking northwest, from roof:

Looking west, from deck:

Looking west, from roof:

Looking southwest, from deck:

Looking southwest, from roof:

Looking further south, from deck:

Looking further south, from roof:

My personal opinion is that there isn't enough "going on" in the water (it IS a weekday, however) to make the view more interesting. Yes, there's more view but it is just more water and mountains. I actually think our view is pretty spectacular as it is. Too bad the house is the size of a shoe box!

The end of a great visit...

2008-08-11T14:45:00.000-07:00

I would love to show photos of our guests but as I haven't asked them about it, I couldn't upload any photos with their girls. As you can see, I had to cut someone out of the photo... this is our friend that E is going around calling "Daddy". Let's just say it's getting confusing around the house. Our friends have two daughters - K, 7 and A, 4 1/2 - and E has had the best time with them. Particularly A. They are as close to friends as I've seen E be with anyone, she adores them. Because K and A call their parents, "mommy" and "daddy", E apparently thinks that that is their names and she calls them "mommy" and "daddy" (as well as M and I, she isn't confused about it, just knows that that is their names!). It's hilarious. She loves her other parents to bits and often at the exclusion of M and I. :)) It doesn't bother me though, it's nice to have an extra set of hands. Anyhow, this photo of E and her other daddy was taken because she saw her friend A having HER photo taken and wanted to get in on it.

Yesterday we drove over to my friend's house, she was having a dinner for our guests last night. A sat next to E in the car and although I couldn't see what was going on, they were literally giggling about something for the whole 5 minute ride. Of course, the next minute A wants to hug E and E makes this screeching noise and looks at me like "Save me!". But there were plenty of hugs, E definitely has figured out the hug. It is sooooooo cute. She's really going to miss these girls.

On the plus side, they have been good company for E and she probably does more than she would because she's hanging out with older kids and trying to "keep up" as well they have been like babysitters because we can enjoy a moment of peace while the kids are on the back deck playing with bubbles or something. I don't have to be the play person. On the downside, they probably aren't the best behaved kids (although to be honest and fair to them, I don't know ANY kids their age nor have I spent the amount of time with their age kids like I have these two so they could ALL be like this) and the little one eats Nutella sandwiches for breakfast, lunch and dinner. Don't get me wrong, I like the stuff but if this is all E wanted to eat, I'd struggle. I've had some issues with her wanting string cheese for the last couple days - like she goes to the fridge, opens it and points to the place the cheese is - but really, it's cheese so at least there's a protein and dairy mixed in with her saturated fat and cholesterol. :)

I don't know if you can see in the photo but E looks like she has a little eyeshadow on her right eye... she got a bug bite (maybe a spider?) while we were camping and it swelled up and looked like she got in a bar brawl or something. It's only now 9 days later starting to fade. It didn't seem to bother her at all though, but it sure bothered everyone else. I got lots of comments on it at the daycare... sigh... you try putting bug repellant (or sunscreen) on the face of a squirmy 21 month old!

So, anyhow, it's been a really, really nice 3 weeks. I actually love when people I don't know so well stay with us because I've really gotten to know them... I've gone out for a glass of wine and a pedicure with S and she and I had a nice chat. We've sat in the hot tub together, the four of us, and drank copious amounts of wine/beer (yes, my weight loss program has taken a hit this month!). I feel like I know them, that I've made friends which I haven't done in a long, long time. Yes, I'm ready for them to go, because frankly our house is too small to keep 7 people for too long. But if they wanted to live next door, I would be completely happy with that. :)

Right ON!

2008-08-07T10:22:00.000-07:00

Weigh in last night brought me back down to 158.6. Unfortunately that, along with turning 40 took my points per day down, which is always a bit depressing. However, I've eaten crazily the past 2 weeks so I can't complain. I just need to settle down again. :)

Still working out though and I'm up to running 20 minutes without an walking breaks. Damn it's hard. The days of running 10k's are long ago... But I'll be ready for my 5k in late September!! That's all for now.

Wk 1 - 180
Wk 2 - 176.4
Wk 3 - 171.4
Wk 4 - 168.2
Wk 5 - 164.6
Wk 6 - 162.8
Wk 7 - 166.8 (I know exactly what this was)
Wk 8 - 163 (which shows here)
Wk 9 - 159.6
Wk 10 - 162
Wk 11 - 158.6

Checking in...

2008-08-04T12:04:00.000-07:00

Hi all

It's been awhile since I've written, it's been a busy two weeks and last week I was in a fog of hangovers (hey, when you haven't been drinking at all, two glasses of wine CAN produce a hangover!) from my wonderful 40th birthday.

Let me start by saying that WW got put on the back burner last week. I mean, the minute I hit 159, I decided that I could relax a bit and I've gone back the other way! Our guests are only here for one more week so I will be able to "dry out" again after they go. In the meantime, I'm completely enjoying having friends here and chats in the evening, etc.

Let's see, where did I leave off? Did I mention that I weighed at 159 the week before my birthday? Then I proceeded to eat pizza Wednesday night (after my meeting), had a dept dinner at Trader V1cs in Palo Alto where I had a lovely prawn curry (which apparently is high in po1nts) and by two days in I was already over my extra points for the week. Oops! Our guests arrived on Friday, there was more pizza and beer, then the weekend (wine, beer, steak), then my birthday (actually not too bad, too busy talking with guests to eat and drink too much) aside from the birthday cake. Then just downhill from there until this weekend we were camping and drinking a lot of wine and eating Pringles and s'mores for breakfast and.... well, you can see where this is going. LOL

On the plus side, I worked out every day but the day after my birthday and only gained 3 pounds at my last weeks weigh in (could easily have been water weight!). I also, for some strange reason, booked a hydrostatic fat test on the day after my birthday. It was really cool. I'd been wanting to do it forever. You basically lay down on a scale that's in water and blow all the air out of your system and they measure your body fat. It's the most accurate way to measure body fat. Anyhow, it's probably good that I waited until I was 40 to do it because if I'd gone the day before, I wouldn't have been healthy for the 'guidelines' - lol - but on Wednesday I was healthy! 20% body fat, not bad. I was surprised. I guess I have a lot of lean muscle mass under all my blubber. :) I talked with the guy about WW and he said that it is a good program but rather generic - basically for people like me who burn more calories at rest since my lean mass is higher, I am probably not getting enough calories (which may be why I lost weight so quickly?) but that for most people it's really good. He gave me some things I could try to get my body fat down more but I really need to get back on plan before I start doing that! Anyway, I was pretty happy with that. I think 30% body fat would have ruined my day! lol

Let's see... what else? OH! The coolest birthday gift ever. I get one hour of instruction in this with M along for the ride (if he dares...). I cannot wait!!! The weather was crummy on my b-day, of course, and although I did go for the 90 minute massage I also got, we didn't schedule the other. Waiting for a nice day (which actually would've been any day but my birthday!). I had a lovely day with M (my boss gives her dept the day off to celebrate our birthdays which is FANTASTIC) and then we got the house ready for guests. We had an eclectic group but it was great fun. There were some balloons around the house and all the adults (about 15 total) were sitting around when one went into the air. We were batting it around the room and having a laugh. Then someone went and got two more and threw them in the mix and it was hilarious, trying to keep the 3 up in the air - something so incredibly simple and goofy and we laughed about it for 15 minutes, it was good fun. There was diving involved at the end and some close saves and just laughter. I wish I could say I got some video of E dancing (her new dance move involves jumping and slapping her knees) because she was absolutely hilarious but I didn't. She is having a great time with our friends two little girls though and it's great to see her interacting with the big kids.

I better get back to work! I'll let you know what happens next WI on Wednesday! bTW Joe, thanks for the birthday wishes... :)

Count down to visitors....

2008-07-22T15:56:00.000-07:00

Hi all,

I'm back with no photos at all this week. Last week was a tough one. I don't know what was going on with E but she was sick for the majority of the weekend and well into the week. I looked it up in my toddler guidebook and it was most likely a NSV (non-specific virus) because she had a low grade fever and also got a rash on Wednesday. She was super clingy for ME and it was verrrrry difficult to have her around while I was working. On Thursday I left to go to our office in Bellevue because she was just too hard to be around AND get work done. I think out of that week, she was in daycare one day and they sent her home two other days. She was unconsolable for them but happy as clam when she got home. Go figure. We started to think maybe something had happened at the daycare but after a full week, she had a good day yesterday at school so I'm guessing all is better. Poor thing. It's hard when they can't tell you what's wrong.

She's got all sorts of words these days - "wots dat?" being the funniest because it's said exactly as I've just spelled it. She's taken to calling M "daddy" now instead of "mama" (that's a relief) and calling me "mommy" which is cute. She says our titles ALOT. She calls herself, I think, meemer which I mistake for mommy but I have deduced that she just hasn't been able to clarify her name yet. It constantly amazes me. We read an incessant amount of "book"s and "choo" (shoe) is another one or and if her diaper is wet or worse, she points at it and says "gicky" which is hilarious because there's no guessing if she needs her diaper changed because, well, she tells you! I guess this isn't too exciting to anyone but me.

WW is still working for me. I broke the 160 lb mark last week and I was shocked. I lost my 10% which is the original goal they give you. I don't know what to do now so I just continued on the losing points values. I'm still doing the sculpte class 3 times a week (although I should really mixed it up) and running/other cardio for an hour the other 2 days. If I'm lucky, I get a weekend workout in but usually not. The sculpte class is really toning my arms, shoulders and legs/butt but does not do a thing for my chest and back. I just don't have the days to fit in more weight training so I'm letting that go for now. I have signed up to have a hydrostatic fat testing on the 30th. I've always wanted to know what my body fat is and this should be interesting. Hopefully it won't make me cry. ;)

Besides that, next week is the big Four-OH. I never thought I would get to this age and needless to say, M doesn't let me live it down about living with an "older woman".. doesn't he realize some day he will be 40 as well. And I will always be older than him. We have some friends coming in to town on Friday night and we'll invite a few other friends for drinks/appetizers/cake (oh yeah, I'm having cake!) that night. Other than that, I'll usher it in quietly, I hope.

Wk 1 - 180
Wk 2 - 176.4
Wk 3 - 171.4
Wk 4 - 168.2
Wk 5 - 164.6
Wk 6 - 162.8
Wk 7 - 166.8 (I know exactly what this was)
Wk 8 - 163 (which shows here)
Wk 9 - 159.6

Back, briefly

2008-07-15T15:13:00.000-07:00

I don't know why I haven't posted lately. I only have one photos from our recent camping trip over the 4th of July. You know how sometimes you have those trips where you want to go home when you just got there? Yep, we had that trip. The drive up was nice. We stopped to see some friends with a cabin and that's where we had the photo taken. We picked up a couple fresh, already cooked crab from my friend and took off within the hour. We arrived at the campsite, it wasn't the best place I've ever booked (site that is, the park itself was beautiful) but somehow we managed to get the tent up with no problem. We have this 'pavilion' for lack of a better word that has 4 posts and a top that goes over our table, keeps the bugs out in the evenings etc. We struggled getting that up for some reason, everyone was cranky. E kept falling off the bench seat of the picnic table, or screaming for food even though for once, I had food ready for her. There were mosquitos and we forgot a few things and the start did not look good.

Other bad signs:
- Sat morning, E was playing with bubbles and fell backwards into the firepit. Needless to say, there was no fire (thank god!) in it, not even a smidgen because it had rained on us the night before! Crying ensued.
- All night (felt like it) fireworks - M80s or bottle rockets or whatever they were called. E managed to sleep through it though.
- Rain. Period.
- Touristy resort nearby. You can imagine.
- Managed to plan my WW menu but didn't bring enough stuff for M and E! lol

Sigh. Maybe not so bad in the grand scheme of things but I would've gone home in a minute if M wanted to. LOL

We are going again this weekend!

Last weekend dawned hopeful as we headed out to our local street fair. Although she didn't spend much time in the sun, E became kind of sick on Sat night - hot, listless, didn't want to eat - and it continued on until yesterday. She seems better now but I don't know what it was. Not bad enough to warrant a visit to the dr but definitely not herself. She's been very clingy and emotional lately too which is wearing on our nerves. Maybe as a parent, we aren't supposed to actually SAY that but there it is, I've said it. I've been challenged. Today seemed better as she headed off to daycare.

Needless to say, not much more going on. I'll post weight loss stats (or non-weight loss stats as the case may be) - I'm happy with how things are going so that's all that matters. I wish I had a before and after shot at this point but I'm not sure you can see any difference, but I can!

Wk 1 - 180
Wk 2 - 176.4
Wk 3 - 171.4
Wk 4 - 168.2
Wk 5 - 164.6
Wk 6 - 162.8
Wk 7 - 166.8 (I know exactly what this was)
Wk 8 - 163 (which shows here)

Our little dancer

2008-06-26T12:12:00.000-07:00

We went to Irish day at Emerald Downs on Sunday, which really means nothing we found out. M joined the Irish Heritage club, hoping he'd meet some fellow Irish but to this point, we still have met none. It wasn't even anything where you might easily meet anyone but really just a bunch of people watching the horse races. It was a nice day out though and E loved seeing the horses (although she calls them 'puppies'). She would even pump her arm in support as they would run by.

We were wandering around and a good Irish sounding song came on the tannoy and our girl started dancing, as she does. There were a couple ladies standing by watching, that's why she is kind of leaning over at the end to see if they are still watching her. ;) We took a couple of funny videos but by far, her dancing is the most entertaining. Oh and she had her first s'more camping this weekend, THAT was funny too.

I don't know if I mentioned that E is in swim 'lessons'. Well, I searched high and low for a swim class with warm water so that we could work on e getting over her dislike of water. Although she doesn't really dislike water, she will splash around in a wading pool or even Puget Sound (last week when we were camping) and we all know how damn cold that is! But she doesn't like getting her face wet. We'd gone 6 times and she was progressively hating it more and more, screaming crying when the instructor would take her across the pool.. basically take her FROM me or her dad and then swim across and hand her back to one of us at the side of the pool. I guess it makes sense but the instructor was not really telling us what to do until she told M not to wait by the edge of the pool. M doesn't like the water and just being in an enclosed swimming facility was likely making him sick each time we went. It's highly possible that she was feeling a vibe off of him but more likely it was us handing her off each time to the instructor. She was freaking. I eventually called the registration area and told them I wasn't feeling the love, the instructor wasn't giving us any idea of how to handle things and I was not signing her up for the next session. We had a good chat and she suggested a bunch of things to try, starting with getting in the water. We've gone 3 sessions with me in the water with her and her dad stayed home. Last night was by far the best, there was a bit of apprehension and crying before we got in but I took her in the water and had her practice holding onto the edge while we waited for the instructor.. I warned her when it was almost her turn so she knew what was coming and when the instructor came over, e went with her and i swam beside. She even high-fived the instructor each time (even when the instructor blew in her face and then dunked her face in the water - blowing on it makes them hold their breath), which was a big deal because the last two times she was like 'no way' to the instructor. She wasn't sure she wanted to but she went down the little slide into the water and she even 'jumped' into the water as well (the instructor hangs out and 'catches' her). All in all, it was a GREAT class. She was really relaxed and we had a fun time together.

Last but not least, I am 1 pound or so away from my first 10% loss. I haven't weighed this since I graduated from college and frankly, I don't know where to go from here. Lose more or stop here and see what happens... I still have flappy underarms and leftover baby belly (much less than before) and I know I need to keep toning... I just wonder if I need to keep losing too. As you might see from the video, I don't look all that 'thin' to me.

Wk 1 - 180
Wk 2 - 176.4
Wk 3 - 171.4
Wk 4 - 168.2
Wk 5 - 164.6
Wk 6 - 162.8

Recovery

2008-06-19T10:12:00.000-07:00

We are still in recovery mode after our guests left last Sunday night. The nice thing is that M has gotten back to work finishing the little jobs that will make this house sale-able. He and his dad put up a fence out back, cleaned up some junk and mowed the grass. So we no longer look like The Clamp3tts out back... well, maybe a little. We still need a run to the dump but you've got to start somewhere!

I don't know why I like this photo - maybe because her eyes look blue (I don't know how clear it is but there is a brown speck in her left eye - left eye in the photo - and I like the fact that she truly has a bit of us both) and they are usually so dark that you can't see that. Anyhow, she had a great time with the grandparents... it was wonderful that she got to spend more than a few days with them and really got to enjoy them. M's dad would feed her breakfast every morning and they'd share a bit of his morning sandwich as well. We got a lot of lovely photos of the two of them sitting on the chairs facing each other and munching on a bit of bread.

As beautiful and fun as she can be, she seems to have become the devil's spawn during the in-between moments. Oh.My.God. Some days I have to laugh because really it's all I can do. The poor thing is mostly frustrated with the fact that she can't communicate what she wants all the time but it comes out in whining, screeching, shouting, laying on the floor in hysterics (that one makes me laugh, I don't know why) and it is truly a trial. I read that the "Terrible Two's" is very similar to having a teenager so in that case, I'm worried. ;) Mostly though, she a joy to be around, she laughs a lot (hysterically at times) and it's the best sound in the world. When did we stop laughing like that?? I wish I knew.

I got the coolest gift for M on Father's Day! I was reading kirida's website again and she had a little video on it and I followed the link to her review of the Fl1p Ultra camc0rder. M had been talking about getting on and this is about the size of a blackb3rry and super easy to use. He loved it. Hopefully I'll be able to post some boring videos in the near future! It's sooooo awesome!

I was truly sad to hear about T1m Russ3rt passing. I was a fan of M33t the Pre$$ (seemed like the only show that got real answers out of politicians) and we always watch the nightly news with br1an w1lliams and he was the political go-to guy. He seemed like a really nice guy - everyone has been telling the best stories about him... you wish that you'd known him!

Finally, last but not least.... WW is working! I bought a pair of jeans and shorts 2 sizes down!!! I guess since you know how much I weigh I can embarrass myself by saying I was in an 18 and now in a 14. With room to spare. Woo hoo! I actually saw some obliques showing up in the mirror this morning! I'm training with Couch to 5K so I've started running and I'm doing sculpte classes at the gym 3 mornings a week right now. Hopefully I'll find some Pilates Reformer classes soon, just to try something different. I better go and get to work!

Wk 1 - 180
Wk 2 - 176.4
Wk 3 - 171.4
Wk 4 - 168.2
Wk 5 - 164.6

Short, but sweet

2008-06-13T12:12:00.000-07:00

Weigh-in post:

Wk 1 - 180
Wk 2 - 176.4
Wk 3 - 172.8
Wk 4 - 171.4
Wk 5 - 168.2

WOO HOO!

Just for fun

2008-06-10T11:39:00.000-07:00

Stolen from my pal Mostly Risible. I didn't think I'd have time to do it but I did. :) It's kind of fun.

Type your answer to each of the questions below into Flickr Search.

Using only the first page of results, and pick one image.

Copy and paste each of the URLs for the images into Big Huge Lab’s Mosaic Maker to create a mosaic of the picture answers.

The questions:

1. What is your first name?

2. What is your favorite food? right now?

3. What high school did you go to?

4. What is your favorite color?

5. Who is your celebrity crush?

6. What is your favorite drink?

7. What is your dream vacation?

8. What is your favorite dessert?

9. What do you want to be when you grow up?

10. What do you love most in life?

11. What is one word that describes you?

12. What is your flickr name?

Happy days!

2008-06-03T16:18:00.000-07:00

A couple weeks ago, I met up with kirida (who, by the way, if you have time to read another blog, cracks me up continuously) and her cutie patootie son N. She's a photographer starting her own business and she took this very cool shot of E. While she was taking it, I thought, 'oh this is going to be very cool, why didn't I think of that?' and I guess the answer is that I am usually following my child around making sure she doesn't fall off of things (we were at the park) so carrying my spiffy camera around can be cumbersome.

It's been awhile since I've written mostly because I've been busy working and on weekends, entertaining Irish folks. M's family is here since mid May and we are settling into a routine. The weather has been brutal which makes life difficult in this small house, also because keeping E in the house all day isn't something I relish. We've been sending to daycare most days, although picking her up early so the grandparents can have some fun. She and her grandad definitely have a bond - there is a LOT of hearty laughter from the upstairs that I can hear while I am still working. It's great to see. I'm sure it has a lot to do with this great age she is at - somehow I manage to block out the tantrums because there are so many smiles and words. She still calls M 'mama' (although when asked "where's mama?" she points at me and "where's dada?" she points at M) most of the time but we continue to correct her. I'm sure she's just playing with us anyway to see how frustrated we can get....

We started 'swimming lessons' on Monday. I did this because she does not like the bath. I figure a bit of time in the water can't hurt. I researched places and we drive about 30-40 minutes to go to a 92 degree pool for 30 minutes. I don't care, it's worth it to me. She has 2 classes a week, 4 other kids of varying abilities with her. She wears little styrofoam thingy's around her waist and the instructor managed to dip her face in the water with no crying! She blew on E's face just before she dunked her face. I think E was so shocked she didn't know what to do but she didn't cry. It was fantastic! There's also a small slide that goes directly in the pool, that's the last thing the class does and she LOVES the slide. I can't wait to see her jump in like the other kids. It may be a ways off but it'll be so worth it. She's amazing. Every day she amazes me.

I love my life.

Week 1 - 180
Week 2 - 176.4
Week 3 - 172.8
Week 4 - 171.4

another day in the month of may....

2008-05-23T08:28:00.000-07:00

We've got this lovely expensive camera and yet we still can't manage to get a photo in focus! I don't know if that's because the girl is always moving or we are just really bad at taking photos with an auto-focus camera. (How can you be bad when the camera focuses for you?)

Anyhow, this was E heading to school last week. We put on the new coat but she put on the hat. Now that she can put them on herself, she likes to wear them. We had to laugh because she looks like an old British lady. ;)

The irish contingent are upstairs while I am working. E is with them and I can hear the irish music and E dancing away. She gets this look of concentration on her face when she's dancing (since it involves doing a circle) but she loves it. She is hilarious. Needless to say, the endless clapping for her isn't hurting her ego one bit! She should be fun to be around when her grandparents head home in a month! NOT!

I debated mentioning this or not because I've gone down the weight loss path before on the blog only to quit once I started to make some good headway. (Beware, posting poundage can be hazardous to your health). Anyway, last January I started watching what I was eating and cutting out alcohol. By the end of March (February), I had lost 15 pounds (from 195 to 180). Because that was my pre-baby weight, I guess I thought it was an okay benchmark, in which to adjust my eating and went back to a normal sort of eating pattern. For the last 2 months I have held steady at 180 with workouts and limited drinking, not snacking too much. Two weeks ago I decided to join We1ght Watcher$. I had been debating for a long time about what the best course of action would be for someone having a problem with how much food she eats, rather than WHAT she eats. I have been too comfortable for too long with this number on the scale... telling myself that I still look fine... that I hadn't weighed what the guidelines suggest I weigh for years.... but I also knew that if I kept going the way I have been going, I'd be 200 pounds before you know it. It used to be that 180 was my upper limit but 200 became the upper limit when I was pregnant. See how easy you can move the bar up?! Anyhow, my 10% goal, which WW uses as the first benchmark regardless of what you need to lose, will take me to 162. I haven't weighed 162 since I don't know when. My head can't even wrap around the number 162! I have to change that line of thinking because we all know the power of positive thinking. I WILL BE 162! And possibly less than that. Who knows? I know I have a lot of work ahead of me. And besides the work, I have to think of it as a change of lifestyle, which has always been the hard part... but should not be impossible! Wish me luck!

And by the way, I probably won't be mentioning the weight loss but will put a little calendar at the bottom of each post to record it for myself. :)

5/14 180.4
5/21 176.4

Can you say 'hair afire?'

2008-05-20T13:36:00.000-07:00

Martin's parents and sister arrive today. If we thought our house was small before, imagine the next month or so. Pray for us! :)

Needless to say, I don't have time to write and I have some really cute photos of the girl. This one of all of us will have to suffice for now. Ciao!

Weekends are good times

2008-05-06T11:03:00.000-07:00

This photo wasn't exactly from the weekend but Thursday night. We took a walk with a friend and her dog, down by the water. Emer loves her Bella, even when Bella is whapping her in the face with her tail. And Bella will wait so peacefully while Emer does her version of 'petting' her which usually involves a harder-than-petting slap. I know that because she's gotten into this phase of 'putting the baby to sleep' (usually me or her dad but sippy cups or her stuff animal Ted work too) and we have to lay down on the floor and she proceeds to cover us with a blanket and pat us (hard) on the head, arm, back. There's really no chance of falling asleep when she's 'putting you to sleep' - it's more like time to go to the hospital! Just kidding, she's not that strong yet. ;)

The other day M went downstairs while E was having dinner. I was sitting with her and she said something and my mind slowly realized that she said "mama go". Now, she hasn't been getting our roles right for a month or so and I realized she was saying that M went! A sentence. Of sorts. She says it all the time now when one of us 'goes'. God, it's cool. It's so cool. There are definitely more words happening now-some only I can understand. She's got bye-bye and HI down pat.

We went to the grocery store yesterday and they have these neat little carts for the kids. She loves that thing and was pushing it around and saying HI to everyone. It was hilarious.

Besides that, we have exactly 2 weeks until M's parents and sister arrives. We are hurriedly trying to finish our two upstairs bedrooms for them to stay in. Basically we move the piles of clothes, toys, diapers, etc from room to room. This morning was definitely a melting point for us - just makes us want to cry that we have no storage. I sooo wish that M would get some help, he doesn't need to waste his time painting when he could be finishing the closet inserts, etc. I guess I could be helping instead of blogging but I try to stay at my computer for when issues come in (it's been slow lately) so that I have a job in the future. It's a great job to have but it's hard to prove your worth when people aren't having computer problems!

I didn't actually say anything about the weekend, did I? The weather was crappy on Saturday which kept 3 outdoor people cooped up for far too long (we finally ventured out and went to the library). Sunday was beautiful and we went to the zoo (with 500 other people - we have the zoo pass so we go for a couple hours and hang out) and then we went looking at neighborhoods and to open houses. We saw a huge house that was brand new and all I can think is, can we move now?
(Don't worry, M feels the same way!)

BI-cicle, BI-cicle.. i like to ride my bi-ci-cle...

2008-04-30T15:36:00.000-07:00

It's a Queen song, not sure if yer man was really referring to
actually riding a bicycle but there you go. M purchased a little gift for E last week, not really sure if she'd like it because a) she hates wearing hats and b) she cries in the bath. So how was she going to do on a bicycle wearing a helmet? Well, curiously, she loved it! From the look of the photos. In the other photos I got, she was looking at her feet or trying to take the helmet off and because I don't want anyone reporting me to CPS, I'll show the one where the helmet stayed on. She kept coming back for more. I bet if she didn't have to wear the helmet, she'd want to be on that thing every day. Now, you may notice that I was not as successful getting my hubby to wear the helmet (I thought if he did it, she wouldn't hate it so bad but he refused saying he was only 'going up the street'. well, guess what? cars can run you over on our boring little stretch of neighborhood road too. and frankly, since some people tend to use our street as a drag racing strip, it's probably more often than not). Anyhoo, we are very much looking forward to being able to bike this summer when we go camping, especially if E continues to enjoy it! Yay!

Finished finally..

2008-04-23T16:18:00.000-07:00

I just finished the application for M's 10 year green card. I can understand why there's so many illegal aliens in this country.... no one wants to bother getting all the crap together and then on top of that mailing a check for $545. It's not bad enough that we had to pay the first two times we applied - first for the f1ance v1sa and then for the adju5tment of status - but everytime we have to do something. Then if we decide to go and live in Ireland for awhile, we'll have to pay again, no doubt, to "save our place" or something silly like that. At this point, I'd say we easily have spent $1000 on this process. It's no wonder some people choose to be illegal, they.don't.have.time.or.money.to.do.the.paperwork... they are too busy working! I don't blame them.

You'd think having a little peanut would be enough 'evidence' but it's not. We have to provide all this other proof, no doubt I have gone overboard but the thought of getting a request for more evidence doesn't appeal. Sigh.

Little daredevil

2008-04-22T14:41:00.000-07:00

We went for a drive this weekend, looking at houses yet again, and we stopped in a cute little town while the rain had stopped and went to the park. We discovered something new about our little peanut, she's a daredevil. She went to the slide and slid down face first and, as you can see from the photo, LOVED it. Now if only she liked the bath this much!

Oh summer, come back to us!

2008-04-17T14:38:00.000-07:00

We were blessed the other day with a 79 degree day (about 25 ish to those Down Under). It was probably the first time our poor child has seen a day of warm sun where she actually didn't have to wear a coat outside, or socks or even pants! Like her mom, she got quite giddy and happy and truly blossomed under the rays of the sun. Unlike her mom, she seems to have retained that feeling the last few days even though it's back to 45-50 degrees (9-10C) and crappy. I just cannot rally when the weather is crummy. I want summer NOW!

We had some lovely people over on the most beautiful day of the year thus far, a couple we met in our P3ps group. Their son, F, is a beautiful and seemingly peaceful child. I was in awe of how he and E seemed to be kindred spirits - actually playing together and acknowledging each other's presence. Usually E plays on her own, or when kids this age are together, they kind of wander around from parent to parent or more or less ignore each other. These two were copying each other and chasing each other and it was lovely to see. Apparently, blogger doesn't want you to see it though as it isn't allowing me to upload a photo.

Oh, there we go!

I have finally put together a make shift slide show of M's work in the house to date, everything he has done. It's pretty impressive. I'm going to put it together in our application for 'removal of conditions' that he needs to go through to get his 10 year green card. Since it's essentially been his job, I need to show that he's committed to this place! Again, we won't be posting any photos at this point but maybe later when blogger starts working again.

above: my already messy office and the finished main room/bedroom

above: the master bath (if only you could see exactly how bad this looked in process, I took a photo of the toilet because I have a photo of all the exposed drainage/sewage pipes that I decided not to share here).

Did I mention, my hubby rocks?!

April Fool

2008-04-01T10:58:00.000-07:00

I have never been one for joking around on April Fool's Day so
this isn't a joking blog entry. It's just the same ole stuff!
Here's my 17 mo daughter strutting her stuff with the newest
outfit du jour. We got these leggings - called Baby Legs, go figure - at a Baby Loves D1sco event and I just started putting them
on her around the house since she prefers not to have clothes on but it's too cold in our state for that! She has the latest in diaper accessories and a t-shirt that her auntie got her that says "Little Irish Dude" (not sure why) and she felt an immediate need to put on her favorite coat. There's also one with her favorite purple hat but she doesn't look as trendy as she does in this one.

Besides my child turning 17 months old today, holy COW, we are unveiling the, hopefully working, heated tile floor in the bathroom today. M said if it doesn't work (after laying it down (can't test it) and putting the tile down) he will go to a bar for the rest of the afternoon. If it does work, he will take off all his clothes and lay on the heated floor drinking Guinness all day. So either way, it's a drinking day for him. ;) I promise in the next few days to take updated photos and show off all the space. I just wanted to bathroom to be more completed before I started showing off his work. We love it.

Last weekend I used the last bit of a gift certificate that I received for my birthday in July last year. I had a facial and a hand/foot treatment at an Aveda salon. Usually I don't do facials because my skin usually looks worse rather than better afterwards but I thought I'd try something different. It was almost as relaxing as the 1.5 hour massage I had the week before (also on the gc). But now I'm out of the gift cert and I won't be doing that again any time soon! I think for my next birthday (the big 4-0h) I'd rather have sessions with my personal trainer. Or maybe a long weekend here. Again, a little more than I'd spend on myself but if someone wants to give it to me...... I'll take it!

I'm getting old! WAH!

2008-03-26T14:17:00.000-07:00

I must be getting old because if I wasn't, I would've known that this was going on last night and I would've been there before everyone else.

Sigh.

I better get out my walker.

Top o'the mornin' to ya

2008-03-12T15:54:00.001-07:00

I'm almost sure that's what she is saying.

..'i think i've found something...'

2008-03-07T12:10:00.001-08:00

This is the most recent thing that E does that M and I cringe over. Actually, she doesn't do too many but this one is hilarious. You can almost see her sticking a pea up there in the future. Since she can really get that finger up there, undoubtedly the pea will go back into her brain. lol

We had kind of an embarrassing, what-kind-of-parents-are-we? moment when M went to pick up E at the daycare and one of the head ladies at the daycare mentioned that E's shoes were too small. The teachers in her group didn't want to tell us - they were embarrassed I guess - but they can't possibly be as embarrassed as the mom who didn't notice they were getting too small. That could explain why one of them (the shoes, that is) constantly ended up on the floor of the car on the way home. Anyway, she seems to be much happier with the shoes that we found for her to wear, those ones do not come off! (Here I was thinking she was just bored with her shoes....)

Other than that, we managed to have our first tear-free bath the other night (hers, not ours). As you might also remember, we've been reduced to washing our child in the kitchen sink. M holds her up while I wash, then she is wrapped in a towel and M holds her over the sink while I wash her hair. It's quite a production and none of us enjoy it. So Sunday was bath day and I was doing a bit of cooking and E was asking to get 'up..up' and so I put her in the sink. Our sink is one of those double ones, so she was squatting in one side and I turned the water on to empty into the other one. E had all her clothes on and she proceeded to watch the water and put her hands in it. I plugged up the sink and filled it up a bit, then I added a little soap so she could see it bubble, then I unplugged the sink and we watched the water go down. I watched E get completely soak ed (I had to put my hands behind my back not to take her clothes off so they wouldn't get wet!)
and play in the water. When we had the bath about an hour later, there was no crying. When I washed her hair, she seemed to go 'in the zone' and actually enjoy it. Ok, well, maybe not enjoy, per se. But it was definitely much more relaxed for everyone.

Oh, and I made my first pizza today. From start to finish. Rolled the dough out, found a recipe for the sauce that turned out yummy and cut up some vegetables and threw some Hillsh1re Farm hot links on it (that's all we had in the house). It was a great pizza. M said it was the best pizza he's ever had (but I think he might be biased - not a problem there!). I may have to play around and actually buy ingredients for it.. I love it when we try something new and it works!!! Oh, and I did I mention I love my job ('cause sometimes I have time to do this!)

A light at the end of the tunnel

2008-02-28T09:09:00.001-08:00

I couldn't type without getting the whole thing underlined but finally I figured it out! I put this photo up even though the girl isn't smiling because I can't believe my BABY looks like this. Almost a little girl. My dad keeps asking me if we own a comb in this house because her hair always looks like this. I try to tell him that we comb it but this is what it looks like 5 seconds later. Oh well! He never liked my hair much either. :))

The title of this post is 'a light at the end of the tunnel' because I literally see the end in sight. Well, the end that means that we can fully use the room, not necessarily the end that says everything is totally complete. M is notorious for leaving bits and pieces unfinished, which I understand, I am assuming due to the relief of the bulk of it being finished. I don't care though because if he wants to move onto one of the other projects left unfinished so that he gets a break, that's okay. Projects will get done. I will hire someone to finish them if I have to. ;) So the three of us can go out and enjoy our weekends again.

Anyhow, we purchased the carpet yesterday and we should have a measuring appt shortly. The carpet could be in by the end of March! Hallelujah! The new plan is for the three of us to move downstairs and have M and some soon-to-be-chosen handyman finish all projects upstairs. Painting both bedrooms, finish trimming the new windows (installed in October), replacing the crown molding (or removing completely). replacing the light fixtures (already purchased in December) and deciding what to do about the floors. Making E's room a true kids room for her - with a play area for her toys and a little desk and chair or something. I haven't decided what yet. Whatever it is, we will be moving my desk and computer equipment out of her room. I don't even like to sleep with electronics in my room but we really had no choice... I'll be glad to see it all moved.

We got an invitation to a first year birthday party for the little boy across the street. He was born last year (obviously!) and we saw him at the shower one of the neighbors held for the family. I can count on ONE hand the number of times I've seen this kid since then and now we are invited to his birthday party? It seems silly and I can't decide between wanting to go so we can see him and not wanting to go because the family is moving in a few months and we'll never see him after that. I would say that we are 'chatting' neighbors - if we ever saw them outside their house. Their place is about 4000 sq ft though and unlike us, their house is big enough to hold the 3 of them and they don't have to be seen outside. So can you see why I think it's kind of funny that we'd get invited to a birthday party? I'm sure there's something else I can do for that 2 hours.....

Anyhow, I better get moving. I'll write more later about our trip to Denver but for now, I actually have to take a shower and go to an office to replace a modem.

My two loves on Valentine's Day

2008-02-14T15:14:00.000-08:00

It's Valentine's Day... that holiday that Hallmark seems to have made up to encourage people to spend massive amounts of money to remember their sweeties. I think I read somewhere that the average dollar amount spent at V Day is $128. Since I only spent about $5 then someone else out there spent a lot of cash!! :))

We don't have any plans tonight, just the same thing we do every night except we'll get a takeaway Chinese or something. But I can't think of anywhere I'd rather be than with M and E.
I was talking with my boss/friend last week when I was in CA and we were remembering the Valentine's dinners we used to have together when we were single but pining over someone or another. We used to drink a bottle of wine and I'd drunk dial my favorite f%^& buddy who I unfortunately wanted to be more than that. Somehow she didn't drunk dial hers but oh well. I never did have a lot of self control in the romance department back in those days. As much as I loved our dinners together (we're pretty sure we were the only female couple out in Mtn View in those days), I wouldn't trade that for what I have now. Even if it means staying home. Romance is where you make it, on the day you want to do it, not some contrived holiday that says you have to. M is in my thoughts when I'm out and about and I always try to bring him a treat or whatever. He always moves the car (or truck) ahead when we've been out so I can just pull in, instead of having to parallel park. I know it sounds silly but things like that are what are special to me. Full dinners cooked because it's Tuesday or whatever. I appreciate everything he does for me and I try to let him know as often as I can. Because it's not just for Valentine's Day anymore!

Hope you all get to enjoy it with someone special!

Bed head

2008-02-11T16:28:00.000-08:00

Her dad caught this photo of the smiling girl this morning. Well, actually it may have been Saturday morning. Ah, all the days are running together. Anyhow, you can probably make out the shinyness under her nose that speaks volumes, yet another cold, yet another 100 attempts to wipe and 100 attempts to avoid the tissue! And I get the ones with lotion! Ah well, such is my daily life.

The weekend was a good one although I am ashamed to say that I missed my caucus because my child was sleeping and my husband was working. I wanted to go, I just didn't want it to be on Saturday! At 1pm! Fortunately, the outcome was good for me and my friend called to tell me about it. I figure the next time, I will be prepared by knowing exactly what it entails.

I did hit the gym twice this weekend, yay me, and I somehow managed to drop a pound even though it was a rough week involving travel. I just have to keep it up. The jeans are baggier but needless to say, I tend to lose it all on top first before the child bearing hips even THINK about making an exit (I don't think I've ever gotten to that part, actually). We spent Sunday looking at houses again - fun stuff after the kid wakes up from her nap and realizes that she is stuck in the carseat AGAIN and cries and shouts and generally drives mama bonkers until we finally go home. Actually we got out and looked at a couple houses and she enjoyed that. It was just getting back in the car that was no fun. Who knows, maybe she gets carsick or car nauseous?

Anyhoo, that's it for now. I have to go and pick up the little punkin in a few minutes. I didn't see her smiling face this morning since I got home from the gym late, so I'm dying to nibble on her cheek and get my hug. :)

Rain, rain GO AWAY!

2008-02-08T16:19:00.000-08:00

Well we got the new battery charger and at this point, I have taken a really lovely photo of E's forehead. It seems like I actually get smiles from the girl if I hold the camera away from me while I'm taking the photo but at the same time, it's not one of those that displays the image you are shooting until after you've taken it (and cut off the lower half of your child's face and all of her body). Needless to say, it'll be a few days before I post with photos.

I can't remember what I posted about last time, chances are I will repeat myself. I apologize.

Last week we went looking at houses in an area east and south of us. The 'burbs really, whereas right now we almost live in the City. I've always had a thing about not living in a neighborhood where the houses are cookie cutter and the yards are a postage stamp size. I haven't really wanted either. BUT. There is something really dreamy to me about living in a brand spanking new house with all new stuff and loads of SPACE. God. We found a house with 2800 square feet out in a neighborhood where all the houses look the same and we.fell.in.love.
Maybe it's because we are tired of our little work-in-progress or the fact that it's tiny, I don't know. But we are hooked now and I don't know if we can go back. Sigh.

I've had a tougher than normal week after my weight loss last week. It's funny how once you lose 10 pounds, your mind seems to think it's okay to eat a bit more or splurge a bit more and pretty soon you've gained back the weight. I haven't weighed myself this week and the pants are getting baggier but I don't feel I've had a good week. I traveled to CA for 2 days, like I do, and I managed to get to the gym on one day and the evening that I usually spend out for dinner and too many glasses of wine/beer with a good friend was spent at her place eating less and talking about weight loss plans. So all in all it wasn't as bad as it could've been. Probably the traveling just throws me off anyway. No doubt things will be back to normal next week. And then we'll fly to Denver to visit friends and that will be tough!

Today I dropped E off at daycare and I had to run to the store to get her some diapers because she was out. When I came back, she was hanging out with 2 girls, they were sitting in these little chairs they have acting like they were reading. It was hilarious. She didn't even run over to me, just kept playing. It warms my heart to see her with her little friends and being independent of me. It rocks. I hope I think that later.. that I remind myself that that is our goal, even though we miss the little peanut that is our baby... even when she's 20! lol

Have a great weekend!

Anyone out there?

2008-01-30T13:57:00.000-08:00

...was a song from Duran Duran's first album, I just remembered. I am probably dating myself but I was a huge fan and still would sit down and watch them on On Demand if only my child would stop shrieking to herself and drowning out Simon and the boys.

So, I'm finally taking a moment to write, it's been more than a month so I won't be surprised if no one's reading. Like I mentioned earlier, our battery charger died for the camera and then, well, I had to work during the day so I couldn't write on this blog as much as I used to. On top of that, add a 15-month old girl who wants to be on mamama's lap while mamama's looking at the laptop and then proceed to pound mamama's work-owned laptop really hard with her little paws. So we just don't get online too much. :)

Having said that, all is well and life is good. I started up at the gym after the new year as well as a no-drinking month (almost over, thank god!) in an attempt to take off a few pounds. It seems to have worked as I am on my way to 6 pounds lost this month (I know, that's too much but I had been eating/drinking a LOT). I finally feel good at the gym, instead of like I'm dying, and I can get up to get there at 6am just like the old days. E's all excited to see me when I come back from the gym even though I am sweaty and gross. It's the best kind of hug to get. She's truly a pet.

We are trudging through the finishing bits of the basement. M is tiling the bathroom this week and I can definitely see the end in sight, thankfully. I know he'll be glad to be done and I know I will be glad to see him done. So we can move. lol Actually, I'm not kidding. Most likely we will put this house up for sale in the summer. Where our future lies, at this point, I don't know. As long as we're all together, who really cares? :))

Happy Christmas!

2007-12-27T11:58:00.001-08:00

It's not a great photo but it'll do. We've lost the charger for the battery for our nice camera, so we had to have a phone photo but it's okay. Needless to say, we only subjected E to this once and since we were in the photo with her, at least she's not crying like all 1 yr old babies do when subjected to a large, white-bearded man in red. We spared her having to do it alone.

It's been craziness lately, starting first with Thanksgiving, then a struggle with finding someone to put up drywall in the basement to my parents visiting for Christmas. They are gone now and a calm has finally descended upon our lives. M has finally stopped living in the basement 24/7 and although E has a lingering cough, she's not had to stay out of daycare for over a month (knocking on wood now).

Thanks to my mom, M and I had a lovely morning/afternoon together Christmas shopping and having lunch out on the Saturday before the day. We were able to finish it all and we both commented that daytime dates seemed like a good idea. We were actually awake, as opposed to our anniversary dinner when we went out for dinner and wanted to go be home at 8:30pm. We'd told the sitter 10 though and we stayed out til 10! But I think it might be daytime from now on.

I realize looking at this photo just how much I've let myself go. It's been a challenge that I haven't been willing to take on. I just haven't been interested in waking up early to go to the gym so I haven't. I haven't said no to ice cream or beer or wine or dinner. I've just gone with the flow. It's so much easier. I don't have the energy. But we all know how to get the energy. go.to.the gym. lol So I am starting next week, with the masses, at the gym. M gave me some personal training sessions which is great but I know myself and therefore will start working out on my own before I call upon the services of another. I have worked out enough to know that, upon starting after a time off, I will get sick after the first or second week and need to take a break to get well. I figure February is a good time to start with the trainer. The hardest part will be eating well. Living with a person who doesn't need to lose weight and does the majority of the cooking. Well, somehow, I'll have to make it work for me.

Anyhow, that's what's been happening to us lately. E is as cute as ever and walking like a mad thing. I'm so happy and blessed!

I'm too sexy for my clothes

2007-11-13T16:24:00.001-08:00

God what a week last week was! Don't get me wrong, I love the munchkin to death but she was home a lot! The pink eye kept her out half of Wednesday and all day Thursday, then the daycare had Monday off for the holiday. That's a lot of time with the girl these days. I needed the break when she left for daycare today. I'm not ashamed to say it. Babies are a lot of work!

She's going through a really snuggly stage right now which is nice because she's never been really snuggly. But on the flip side of that coin, she's also very clingy - if i walk into the kitchen, the whining starts, even though i might be talking to her the whole time. This whole mom thing can be a challenge! I don't honestly know how people have more than one kid! lol

Sometimes I make myself feel better by watching Jon & Kate plus 8 (I think it's on TLC). They were the couple who had IVF and had twins. Then wanted another child (think ONE) and had sextuplets!!! OH.MY.GOD.NO. God obviously gave them to people who could handle them but I just could.not.do.it. They're amazing. Although I do feel a bit sorry for Jon because he can be quite hen pecked.

Ok, now that I'm talking about TV shows in my blog, I better go because it's only going downhill from here!

Too tired and worn out to blog

2007-11-07T15:26:00.000-08:00

I don't know what it is about this time of the year but I started to get tired and "ho-hum"-ish.. I can't return calls, I can't get organized, I can barely stay awake until 9pm. i thought it would change with the time change but even now I can't rally. Poor E, after having a cold, then a yeast infection, then 1 yr shots and hearing test, now has pink eye. I hated pink eye, it was impossible to keep my eyes open when I had it and seemed to take forever to go away. Chances are, I will get it. Although, since I've had the eye surgery, I probably don't touch my eyes as much as I used to. So maybe we'll be okay. E will be home the next few days until she's no longer contagious. Sigh. Poor pet. It took two of us to give her the eye drops - one to hold her down, the other to open her eye and drop. Now I guess it's fortunate that I had contacts because I'm pretty good with the drops! :))

Anyhow, that's all. That's where I've been and what I've been doing. I haven't even been reading. I need a vacation already! And I just had one. More later..... Hope you all are well....

Halloweeny

2007-11-01T13:19:00.001-07:00

Before: After:

I don't know... I think she liked it. The true test was when we went to our friends house and their dogs sniffed her butt!

I have more photos to post from vacation so I'll write more then.

BUH BYE

2007-10-12T16:45:00.000-07:00

I will be out of the office from ....

yep, we are going on vacation. I wish I could say we were going somewhere exotic and tropical or even new and exciting, but we're not. We're going to see my folks, meet up with my brother and his family (who haven't seen E yet) and attend the wedding of a dear friend whose marrying her own irish lad. I'm thrilled for her!

I may or may not get photos uploaded to journal our trip but I will definitely post when I am home. That gives you about 10 days to read one less blog! (Or maybe find one more interesting one...)

Ciao

Where in the heck has she been??

2007-10-05T11:34:00.001-07:00

...you might be asking yerself if you are one of the 6 people who read my blog. I don't even know the last time I wrote but it's been awhile. We've had a trip to California, in which we became those people - you know the ones whose child is crying during the first 15 minutes of your flight.... We didn't book a seat - midday on a Sunday I thought we'd be safe to get a seat but NO! the flight was full. We had a squirmy, tired 11 mo old on our laps, literally on our laps as she finally fell asleep with her head on my leg and her feet splayed across her dad. It didn't look comfortable but it lasted for the remaining 1 3/4 hours of the flight. I had big wet patches on the leg of my jeans when it was over because we seemingly have the most drooly baby ever. Cute, but drooly. (Having said that, she DOES have 7 teeth where most of her peers have 4 or less) So yeah, that's what I was doing.

Since we returned, we (the girl and I) have had colds (mine's mostly gone but hers is lingering) that laid me out for a few days. Work has been exceptionally busy because my co-worker was on vacation, prompting me to learn what she does in the favored form of trial-by-fire or 'putting Anne in the hot seat'. Although she did *try* to teach me all she could before she went, there was inevitably some things that came up that were 'surprises'. Anyhow, I learned a lot that week and that's good.

The big news is that our little bundle of joy has started taking her first unaided steps (to be honest, she was never really "aided" with stepping because we weren't sure we wanted her to walk any time soon). She actually walked over to her dad to say hi in that photo above. It's absolutely precious because when she starts walking, she gets quite excited and the arms go into 'windmill' action (or wax on/wax off mode) and she sits down. She'd probably get a lot farther if she didn't flap. lol Interestingly, since she started walking, she also started crawling in turbo speed. I was out with a couple moms/babies from my childbirth ed class and E would start crawling away from us and out the door with a speed I hadn't seen previously. I actually think there was smoke behind her when she took off but maybe she farted and was trying to get away! Anyway, I spent a lot of that hour following her our to the sidewalk, or into the kitchen of the cafe, or over to strangers where she'd still down and charm them all. I'd eventually pick her up and bring her back, she would take off again. She had no interest in hanging out with us. So there you go, she's only 11 months old and already I am getting a glimpse of my future with a teenager.

Happy days

2007-09-13T12:54:00.001-07:00

We just sent our friends from London on their way south. They arrived to us Saturday and the last few days have been an alcohol-induced fog. The Orbit gum must do a trick because no one asked me if I'd been swimming in a vat of red wine when I dropped E off to daycare. Whew! lol

The few days involved us hiring a babysitter (the girl at the daycare) and enjoying an adult-only drinks and appetizers fest at the Matador in our 'hood. It also involved us both calling in "well" on Monday and heading into downtown for a day of sightseeing (and more beer, for them. I chose to be DD since someone had to pick up the child) on the most beautiful day this week. They went Pike Place and picked up some of the biggest halibut steaks I've ever seen (if only I had a photo) and made us dinner that night. Needless to say, I did not finish mine!

Last night we met up for drinks with some other friends at a small park in our 'hood to watch the sunset. It was another decadent night of indulging and staying up too late and with the dreary cloudy weather today, it's a wonder if I will ever wake up. I think I better go to the gym because if I don't, E and I will be heading to bed at the same time tonight.

Camping this weekend! We are going to Deception Pass State Park and we can't wait.

A lesson

2007-09-06T16:06:00.000-07:00

Can I tell you how hard it is to get a close up (and a smile) of this one? She's always grabbing at the camera and I have to use one hand and hold it away from myself, hence that her head is cut-off. Ah well. She's still a cutie. lol

Yesterday I picked her up at daycare which is maybe 3 miles from our shed (that would be our "wee" house) and I had to stop for gas and she was happy as a clam. As soon as we pulled back on the road, the wild crying baby started in and after a while, it was all I could do to get home. You know, you stop saying 'what is it, pet?' because frankly, she ain't able to tell you, she just cries harder. I could've stopped but I wanted to get home because I knew once out of her carseat, she'd be okay again. And she was.

So, I plop her down on the floor like I usually do and I'm going to run back out to the car to get all my stuff from the day and she starts crying hysterically like 'don't leave me!' So, I sigh, and do not go out to the car but decide to try and clean up so I'm to and fro-ing and she's crying and I'm starting to get a little pissy because I need to get sh!t done. You know how you need to get sh!t done. So, although I was frustrated and grouchy by this point, I decide to lift up my little punkin and sit on the couch with her and she smiles and my blood pressure goes down considerably and what I realized is sometimes you just have to chill out. What sh!t needs to get done that badly?

Did I mention I think she's getting at least two more teeth? Yep, that's the fussy behavior. Poor thing. By the way, we got over our woe-is-me thing. Thanks to everyone's responses. Lori, we'd love to hang out with you guys anytime, we aren't age elitists (regardless of how my post may have seemed. :))! Hello insomnia, maybe we'll see you at the park again sometime.

Our new latest fun thing

2007-09-03T16:19:00.000-07:00

I love this jumper thingy. It tires out a very active 10-month old baby even easier than she normally tires out herself. She can jump in this thing endlessly. And she's smilin' the whole time. It's awesome!

M and I are going through our woe-is-me, why-don't-we-have-friends stage again. I mean, we DO have friends. We have a few super nice people we see regularly, a few wonderful people we see less regularly and some we see because we invite them over and they never, ever, ever invite us over again. We both have smelled ourselves and think we smell fine. We have other friends so we know it's not "us" per se. We absolutely cannot for the life of us find other like minded parent types that just need a little adult conversation while their children poke each others eyes out and bonk each other over the head with toys (fortunately soft toys at this age!). Excuse me, let me re-phrase that, we can FIND those people but unless we invite them to do something, we would never see them again. Ever.

How hard can it be to meet 30 something people with babies who want to make the acquaintance with other 30 something people with babies? As much as I love M and he's my best friend and I his, we do spend 24/7 with each other and so sometimes finding new things to talk about can get difficult. Sometimes M might like to find someone to discuss his house remodeling stuff with who actually understands what he's talking about and I like to talk about what E's doing now and whether it's normal or whacky or just plain odd. I know people move in and out of Seattle and I'm sure that not all the people here already have friends and family that occupy their whole weekend but where ARE these people? Where are the people who have a couple hours to spare with friends - to make friends? How do I do this? I've done it a lot as a single and I know it's hard. I know meeting people you connect with is as hard as finding a pair of shorts to fit this post pregnancy body (is that a good one? I couldn't decide... maybe I'll think of something better as I type along) but I keep trying. I don't try TOO hard but I try..

I know these people are out there. I've seen them at Easy Street having breakfast too early like we are (although why we continue to eat there is beyond me as it is not.that.good), I've seen them walking at Alki and at Lincoln Park. I've seen them. Maybe some day, they'll see us too.

Good taste

2007-08-24T12:43:00.000-07:00

So needless to say, the girl has started crawling around the place like it's the Indy 500. If you leave a green beer bottle on the floor, or heaven forbid, your morning coffee cup, her head goes down and she's got the bottle in her mouth or her hand in your cup before you can say Boo. You've got to be quick and worse yet, you've got to be AWARE. There is no relaxing with a baby on the prowl. Every scrap of paper (you know how you used to rip open the mail and maybe a stray bit falls to the floor every now and then?) will find it's way to her mouth. I have to physically go outside and dump the recycling (paper) every day. Can't just leave it on the couch until you FEEL like bringing it outside. Oh no. The problem is.. some of the stuff you spot as.she's.putting.it.in.her.mouth and it's too late then. You're like "uh, what was that?" as you try to pry open her mouth. It's hard to get past those 4 little razor teeth. I just let her eat it now. Eventually, it seems to come back out.

I don't know if I mentioned that the daycare was kind of nazi-ish in it's need to have E eating chunkier foods. They don't want anything mushy because I guess they have to feed her then. So, she's been getting chunkier foods. And to be honest, she's come a long way and can/will actually pick things up and eat them fairly dexterously. Especially if I walk away when I've fed her, she tends to clean the highchair like a little vacuum. She particular likes this breaded chicken from Costco (when you find something she likes, you go with it), sweet potatoes (I have noticed an orangish tint to her skin tone), green beans (finally), pears and apples. She doesn't so much like red meat (I haven't given it to her enough days in a row yet) and I've yet to try tofu and fish. That's next. I just can't believe how much she's changed (yes, I know they are supposed to change but I'm always surprised! :))...

The last couple days she has started opening the cupboards. I don't know if you can see our TV stand in the back ground of the photo but she's started opening the glass doors (rather than looking at herself and/or smacking them with her hands) and the other day, she went through all the DVDs and decided on Monty Python's The Life of Brian. Of course. My baby rocks!

At the beach

2007-08-13T14:44:00.000-07:00

I don't have much to say these days. No reason in particular, just not feeling it. Plus I broke the nail of my right pointer finger to the quick and it's painful to type (yep, I'm one of those geeks that types with two hands!).. But I wanted to post a photo of the girl during our recent trip to the Oregon coast.

I didn't think it was possible to love someone so much... I think you're meant to get sucked in when they are this age so you don't throw them out when they get to be two and beyond. Your brain goes mush and somehow you put up with all those awful years. :) Anyhow, right now, she amazes me every day.

Thinking on this

2007-07-30T15:44:00.000-07:00

Oh, I've already noticed that this keyboard is typing what I have to say quite a bit later than I want. Needless to say, that means lots of typos. And going back, and re-typing, etc.

Yesterday was my birthday, the big three-nine. I don't feel 39. I can't believe I have a baby and I'm 39. I always thought I would've done things much earlier. I don't really mean anything by that - it's more of an observation of myself - but I just thought I would've. I also would've thought that I'd learned not to say hurtful things to people, even if they are truthful. Or maybe I would know how to say truthful things that might be hurtful more diplomatically, so they aren't hurtful. Either way, it seems I have not learned it and I said something stupid to a dear friend. I am debating with myself about writing it here - writing it, telling people, makes me take accountability again (I've told M and he was not happy with me) but it also gives people the opportunity to make me feel better and I don't necessarily think I should. My friend and I worked through it and hopefully, she will take what I said as constructive criticism and try to ignore the fact that I was so thoughtless. Sigh. It's weighed heavily on my mind since it happened Thursday and I don't know if I should bring it up again with an "I'm sorry I hurt you"-type card or let us move on? Any suggestions?

I don't have any photos to post today, even though we took some cute ones this weekend. I haven't done any downloading since then. I did get to the gym however, so that's a plus in my favor! And it's a short week, as I'm taking Friday off since my boss gives us a day off for our birthdays! Should be nice!

Summertime fun

2007-07-19T09:29:00.000-07:00

I'm not thrilled about this photo of me looking so white in the middle of summer but I do like the two of us together. We were camping last weekend, it was hot and muggy and somehow we still had smiles on our faces.

Daycare is working out well. Some days are better than others for the girl. I think she just needs to get used to the fact that even though we leave her, we will be coming back for her. I can't say enough about what a good idea I think it is for her to be around other kids, even other people. We might have even left it a bit long, she'll have a harder time adjusting that she might have if we left her in earlier. But she will adjust! When she gets home, I make sure I give her lots of love and full attention if she wants it. But she's becoming independent and sometimes just wants to do her own thing. I took her to a local park, on the water, and we sat on the beach for a good half an hour getting sand in every crevice, as you do. I kept thinking of how a lot of times I find myself trying to keep her clean (more my issue than anything else) when being dirty is what it's about to be a kid. So the hand goes in the mouth, sand and all, and I try not to think of the dogs that might have peed on it! lol I know too many people who are trying to keep their kids clean all the time and then they get a little anal about it (the kids) and I certainly don't want that. She's going to get anal about enough things in her life, eventually!

Last night we took an infant CPR class. It was literally the first time we had left her with anyone other than relatives (aside from daycare). I think we did okay. We were only gone for an hour and a half but it was good. She was good (or so they said!) which is really the biggest relief. We might even be able to leave her with other people someday so we can go to dinner! lol

Well, I guess that's it for now. I uploaded that photo rather than use photobucket and I am typing WAY faster than it's showing on the screen. I don't think I'll try that again! For now, I'm going to sign off. I'll write more soon.....

Two posts for the price of one!

2007-06-29T15:32:00.000-07:00

I can't help but post cute photos of E whenever I get a chance. Finding daycare for an infant, I've discovered, is like buying a house in the Bay Area. If you see it and you like it, you better make an offer that second or you'll lose out. At least, that's what it used to be like. I don't know where I'd left it with our nanny whose been watching E for a couple weeks. She got a job at Alaska Airlines and her last day was going to be the 6th. In our scramble to get something else setup, we did something odd. We consulted the P-H-O-N-E-B-O-O-K. You've heard of these things. They came around before the days of computers. Before you could just go on c-----list and click the link that says Childcar3. I don't know why we didn't go to the Yellow Pages before. I've been doing a gazillon searches on the web and came up with little. We found a place about 3 miles away, they just happened to have an infant opening, we went to see it and agreed it would do and she starts next week! Our little girl, heading out in the world. We're going to lose it on Monday, I'm sure. Maybe we'll just register, go for coffee, and then go back and pick her up. We may have to ease into it. For our own sakes, not hers! lol

Finally making a house a home

2007-06-29T15:29:00.000-07:00

Our new garden:

A different angle:

Thanks to a lot of hard work on M's part and a bit on his dad and our neighbor, our garden finally has something to it. There's still a lot of work to be done but we have a little space to sit back and enjoy on a daily basis. Now, as long as none of the plants die, we'll be happy. :)

Dirt is good food

2007-06-26T13:05:00.000-07:00

So..uh yeah...I was out helping dad with the garden today..Can you tell?

Learning something new everyday

2007-06-13T16:47:00.000-07:00

We took our first ride on the swing last week. We also experienced the top of a slide but that photo is on my phone and I don't know how to get it here. I think she kind of liked it. M's convinced she's going to be a daredevil like her mom and I hope that's true. I hope she's adventurous (in the legal way, anyhow) because it makes life more interesting.

We've had a pretty busy few weeks. After M's parents left (did I mention they were here?), we went camping for the first time with the girl. Actually, it was the first time he and I went too - I don't know why we've never camped together because we both like it. We drove west until we found dry weather. (We found it.) We tested out our new tent, our new air mattress, etc, etc. We found out that our lovely car, advertised as a sports utility type vehicle and one of the most popular vehicles in the northwest, barely fit all our camping gear. So what happens if we get a dog or if we want to take someone with us?! They have to sit on the roof, I'm afraid!

We experienced E's first cold too, right after the camping trip. We got to see firsthand what it was like to have a baby that woke up in the middle of the night. It's hard and I'm glad it's over.
She's still a little snotty, we call it, but thankfully, she's sleeping during the night. Naps are harder, she definitely doesn't want to be asleep. Too much fun stuff to learn about, I guess. At least at night, we go to sleep too, so it's not such a big deal. lol

Last weekend, we went out with a couple from our Peps group. It's a parenting group that we had joined when E was born. We did it for 12 weeks and then everyone fell off the face of the planet. Except the ones who are our neighbors, who we've seen once a week, whether they are just passing by on a walk or what. These people we actually made plans with and we all went on a hike! It was a really good time and M and I talked afterward about how much we like them and hope they liked us. It's like interviewing for friends or something. We wonder if they liked us as much and whether we'll get together again! lol Sounds like junior high, doesn't it?

One thing we've experienced since living in Seattle is that the majority of people are friendly on the surface but when you want to get to know them better, they definitely disappear. We've decided to make more of an effort to "put ourselves out there" because without family around, friends become really important. I would say 90 percent of the people we meet have family around or were from here, and they just don't have time to fit you in. That's just our observation. Believe me, I know we have a lot to do with it which is why we are going to work harder. But you can only ask so many times when people don't reciprocate. Eventually you give up.

Every day gets better..... well, interesting anyhow

2007-05-22T16:12:00.000-07:00

This last few weeks has been busy. E has been sprouting up a couple teeth (two at the same time! oy!) so needless to say, she hasn't been a happy camper. One minute she's smiling like a crazy thing and then suddenly it's crying and fussy and ugh, here M, she's yours, you hold her for awhile. lol (seriously folks, M's a brilliant dad and she's a daddy's girl. i'm definitely hovering on the outside of this trio.)

Besides that, M's parents came over from the Emerald Isle. They arrived last Wed and are here for a couple more weeks. It's been going well. M's mam takes E for walks and M's dad is frustrating..er.. helping M finish a major project. Another project, you may ask? Yes, there is a big hole downstairs where a window used to be and some concrete wall. They are installing the french doors that used to be in our kitchen. That room is going to someday be our master bedroom, provided we don't move out of the city and get a huge house for nothing.

I was hoping to get started on Weight Watchers but haven't had the time or energy to get to a meeting. With all that's going on, I guess I'm going to wait (and have to pay $20 extra bucks because there's a special going on right now) until the folks leave. I was hoping to get to the gym while they've been here but my pillow-top has me pinned to it most mornings. I can't move. It's frustrating. I desperately want to and need to see my belly size decrease and I can.not.get.motivated. This is not like me. I actually LIKE working out. I miss the gym. I just can.not.get.going. Sigh.

OH! and last but not least, I had LASIK surgery last week!!! WOOOOO HOOOO. The best thing ever and so much less painful than having a baby with no meds. lol I went in early in the morning, had the procedure which took all of 30 minutes, rested in a dark room for about 4 hours and could see by mid day with no glasses or contacts. When I went in for my follow up on Friday, my eyes measured 20/15 (20/20 being the best, 20/15 being smaller "better")! I was saying things like "is that a hiker over there on the Olympics (mountains approx. 200 miles away)?" and silly things like that. I cannot believe I didn't do this sooner. It's a dream.

we've been really busy...

2007-05-01T12:08:00.000-07:00

...working on our sitting up. Hi all, today is E's 6 month birthday. I can't believe it's been six months! I can't believe that it's been a month since I've been able to get on here and write. Holy cow!

I was lucky enough to get to see Anonymous G and Ang for lunch, when G was in town. I picked a place that would be easy to find and that I *thought* would be good and it wasn't. It really bugs me when I know a lot of good places in this area. Ah well. Let's just say I won't be sending anyone to the Pyramid Alehouse down by the Mariner's stadium. Although the waiter was mildly entertaining. Poor E's first meeting with G and Ang and she melted down midway through lunch. I had to make a run for it and interestingly enough, she chilled once we got out of the restaurant... I think E didn't like the place either! :))

On top of everything else, we've had a nice few weeks as a family. Weekends where we take long walks and enjoy the great weather we've been having. Even a trip to Home Despot or Lowe's is nicer when you are there as a family! lol Although the kitchen needs a few finishing touches, we've moved out to the front yard for demolition. I may have mentioned that we have families of boys on both sides of us, ages ranging from 6-13. Because the guy who owned our house before us didn't care, they like to use our yard as a thoroughfare. They have been known to play in our front yard because it's flat and I assume so both sets of parents can see them. Since we work at home, we've asked them to leave but they still tromp through the backyard. So we are putting up a fence and we are landscaping the yard a bit so it isn't so conveniently flat. It gets annoying. So that's our current project. Getting easier to do when E is getting closer to staying upright as the photo shows!

So that's it, a quick note to tell you what's going on. We are taking a quick trip to San Diego to visit my folks and shortly after that M's folks are coming over for their first trip to America! Looking forward to it as I know they are looking forward to seeing E. Woo HOO.

the start of a new page

2007-04-03T15:43:00.000-07:00

Let's just say it this way...

Hello:

Goodbye :

I sold one baby to make way for another. I'm just a few steps away from a minivan. NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

Ah, where do the days go?

2007-03-31T15:22:00.000-07:00

Gone are the days when I could while away the hours reading or online or working in the garden... well, in fairness, they aren't completely gone. I really try to have some "full on" time with Emer during the weekends because when I work during the week, she gets a video while her dad finishes painting or putting on skirting board or handles for the new cabinets, etc. The weekends are our quality time and I try to take that seriously. Sure, sometimes we have to run errands. Sometimes we have to laundry. Sometimes, often, it's pissing rain and we are stuck indoors. But sometimes, every now and then, I get lucky and there is a window of good weather where we get to go for a walk together, or sit out on the back deck and hang out in the sun. Or at least, the non-rain. :) When Emer takes her naps, I run around trying to get the kitchen cleaned up or a bit of laundry finished or bottles made. It seems like there's always something to do. And we're the lucky ones.... our precious bundle sleeps. She goes down about 7-8pm and sleeps until morning. We get two hours together in the evenings where we're both too tired to anything other than watch tv and share a bottle of wine. Some of our friends aren't so lucky. We are truly blessed.

So, since I wrote last I have turned down the job that would've allowed me to move to san diego. i just didn't like the girl i would've been working for and i would've been away from emer and martin too much.

On a happier note, our kitchen is mostly finished. We need new light fixtures and new countertops. Honestly, I don't know when we're going to fit that in. M's finding it alot harder to do work on the house when he's supposed to be watching Emer. Go figure. I'm thinking of lining up a daycare and saying 'hey, why don't we drop her off here today?' lol

It's all good. Just busy. As I guess it should be when you have a baby.

wondering where I'd gotten to?

2007-03-13T11:40:00.000-07:00

Yep, I went for the huge photo. It really captures her look the best. :))

So much has changed since I last wrote. I'll have to fill you in on it. Soon. I'll be back in the next few days to tell you where I've been and what's been going on. In the meantime, here's my smiley girl.

Miss you all!

Sorta getting it back together

2007-02-09T17:54:00.000-08:00

I settled for a big photo. The other was too small. I have a big surprise for M's birthday, a new digital SLR camera. I think it will help us get photos of E smiling - we seem to miss it because our stupid little Olympus just isn't quick enough. Or the batteries are dead. You know, you've heard it from me before. So anyhow, I researched the camera and I found one I hope he likes. Really, it's the only thing he ever talks about wanting but he hasn't had time to buy. It's a surprise and it's all I can do not to tell him what it is! Especially because this morning we took a photo of himself and E, in their "work clothes" (M's remodeling the kitchen) and she was only smiliing for a split second and I missed it.

The kitchen is moving along. M has the upper cabinets installed, the floor tiled, the outlets ready for wiring (he just needs to put the box in the wall) and the plumbing plumbed. I am constantly amazed at how much he can do. He's such a perfectionist though, I can only imagine how long it would take if he was satisfied with his work. Sometimes I have to say, honestly, who's going to notice that if it's a teeny-tiny bit off. Otherwise he'd never finish! lol But really, he's incredible with this stuff, really incredible. I can't wait to use the kitchen. I'll post photos when it is closer to being done.

E is doing well, tomorrow she has an appt with the dermatologist to look into her rashes. I think it's just non natural fibers that are getting to her.. based on where I see the rash. I can't really tell but maybe this doctor can shed some light into it for us. Unfortunately I have to fly down to CA for the day, so I won't make it to the appt but that's okay. I don't need to be at all of them!
Besides that, she's finally entertaining herself a bit. We can put her down with a Baby Einstein DVD and she happily watches that, drooling and laughing with it. Yep, I've already succumbed to letting her watch TV at 3 months! lol

I went to yoga yesterday for the first time since I had E. Oh my god, did I feel it today! I mean, it felt great at the time but this morning I was so stiff! I can't wait to get back to the gym, I just have to figure out how to fit it all in. I feel a little guilty since M has to work on the kitchen all the time, I try to watch E so he can do the work, I don't feel like I can take any time for myself until he's done. We're a team and I need to help him (by watching E) so he can get stuff done. He's not out doing anything for himself.... Well, you can see where I'm going with this. But the yoga class was a pre/post natal class so I was able to bring E. She slept most of the time, then the rest I laid her out on a mat with her blanket and she laid on her back and looked up at me and smiled. It was lovely. I'm hoping to set her up in the daycare at the gym when I get back so I can get an hour workout in.. I can't believe how hard it seems to get motivated to do it! :)) And I actually WANT to go back to working out. Does that make ANY sense? lol

Anyhow, that's all from here. Just hanging in one day at a time. I'll post again when I get a chance. Thinking of you all, even though I'm not able to comment much. I do read your blogs though.... hugs

Multi tasking at its finest

2007-01-22T17:48:00.000-08:00

I thought the last photo was too big.. This one is too small. What happened to Photobucket? They changed... Gosh, you go away for a few months and blogger changes, photobucket changes, I've changed! Everything is different.

I'm sitting here typing, as my foot is tapping on the bouncy chair that has no bounce. The batteries may have died, or, because we got this second hand from some friends, the vibrator part occasionally goes on the fritz. Whatever it is, I have to bounce the girl sometimes when she's getting tired.. then she'll fall asleep.. It's like rubbing your head and patting your belly (or is it the other way around?) - it's tough! But she's napping and that's all that matters.

I was supposed to start working today. We have no kitchen though so I eked another day out so that M could get some work done. Only we had to go to the pediatrician because it seems our little pet has eczema and this rash seems to be making her rather fussy. Or maybe she's just getting fussy. I don't know. Just when you think you've got it figured out, it changes. Like blogger. Like photobucket!

Unfortunately, I have to go back to work tomorrow so M is stuck. He'll have to start working when she is asleep or after I finish work or maybe while I am working... sometimes it's not too busy. He's only getting the backerboard down so that he can lay tile. We are wondering why we decided to get rid of the hardwood floor there instead of just refinishing. Ah well, lesson learned.
Anyhow, it's a noisy bit of work since it requires a bit of hammering...

I'm looking forward to going back to work (did I say that last week? am i repeating myself?)
because some days I just can't get a thing done. It's funny how having more to do makes me more organized.. does anyone else feel like that? Laying around the house just makes me lazier sometimes. Anyhow, I am looking forward to challenging my mind a bit. And I'm certainly looking forward to having something to talk about other than E - it's hilarious really. M and I talk about two things and he talks about one and I talk about the other. He talks about the kitchen. He can't stop thinking about the kitchen even in the evening when we are having dinner, I can see him looking over my shoulder and contemplating all the work he has left to do. I only talk about E - the rash that looks so uncomfortable, why she's being cranky suddenly, how cute she is, etc. I am boring. I've become my own nightmare. And therefore, going back to work is a NECESSITY. Getting back to the gym, also a necessity. Having a life, you guessed it, necessity.

I've started to see this homeopathic doctor, if you call him that. He works with acupunture and chinese herbal medicine. This is to take care of an ongoing problem but one that flared up after giving birth. I've only been once but I like the practice. He gave me some chinese herbs to take but god, they are nasty! If you've ever taken echinacea with golden seal as a tincture, under the tongue, it's akin to that. Bleccch! All I can say is that it better be working because I'm choking it down twice a day. I think it's meant to get my chi in order or something. Let's hope it works. Unlike the last acupuncturist I went to, I don't have to go back for two weeks. So it would seem he's not out to dry out my checking account anyway. I'm more committed this time, I'm going the distance. I've had this problem too long and surgery cannot be the only option. Treating the symptom and not the problem is the problem with western medicine sometimes. I'll keep you posted.

Ok, that's all. It was nice having a 20 minute space of time to write. What will I do now? She's still asleep so I might actually write a few emails! Or read a magazine. The mind reels.

I'm in love....

2007-01-13T18:24:00.000-08:00

I don't know where to start. After over a month away, I'm finally home. I left for San Diego back in December and spent a week there, enjoying the sunshine, getting myself back. I took Emer out and about, by myself, got more comfortable with her and my ability to take care of her. We had a great time and I know my parents enjoyed spending time with her. Before we left Seattle, she was sleeping in our bed and would absolutely not go to sleep in the pack and play beside us. By the time we left for Ireland, she was sleeping on her own in the pack and play. Not only that, but sleeping through the night. We are blessed.

Without making this a blog strictly about my little girl, well.. it's kind of hard, since that's all my life has been for the past two and a half months. The amazing thing is how much she's grown. How much she's changed. She's smiling at us now. It's truly a miracle. I can't say enough.

Ireland was great. The flight over on Aer Lingus was brilliant, the stewardesses were so sweet to us with the baby. We had a bassinet, which meant we had a place for Emer to sleep which was nice. We sat next to a nice couple with another baby a week older than Emer. It was the first time we spent any time with anyone with a baby and it was fun to talk about our youngsters without feeling like we had to stop! We arrived with no problems and spent the 3 weeks visiting Martin's friends and family. It was a lot of craziness but we even managed to get a couple nights out on our own - drinking pints of Guinness - YUM - and catching up with everyone. Martin's sister had had a baby in July, her second, and he is adorable and really mellow. Her older son David, at 4 1/2, was in love with "Baby Emer" and would give her the sweetest gentlest kisses on her head and hugs. Then he'd run around like the Tasmanian devil the rest of the time! But he was always gentle with her. He wanted us to leave her in Ireland!!

I managed to catch up with one of my best friends, Julie. She had spent the last 5 months in Ireland and had met a lovely guy. They had just moved to Edinburgh in Scotland, to try and make things work as she couldn't stay in Ireland any longer due to visa restrictions. She had flown home over Christmas to LA and her flight went back through Dublin. She had a 6 hour layover so we picked her up at the airport and went into town for a couple pints and a catch up. It was absolutely brilliant - it had been over a year since I've seen her - and she is so happy. It's great to see and I hope everything works out for her and her irishman!

We spent the last 3 days in San Diego again and enjoyed a few days of 80 degrees before heading back to Seattle. The night we arrived to six inches of snow! It was such a bad storm that my friend who was going to pick us up from the airport couldn't get there. The taxi rank was 2 hours long so we ended up renting a car and driving home at 25 miles an hour. We made it. It's been crazy cold and icy for the past two days! What a welcome home.

Anyhow, there is so much that went on.. too much to post about, almost. I'll write things as I think of them. And hopefully I'll be posting photos each time.... Maybe one of these days I'll be able to get to read your posts as well!! I hope you are all doing well.

I'm back

2007-01-11T10:08:00.000-08:00

I don't know if any of you are checking on this site anymore but we're back. Keep checking in for updates and photos. I just got home last night, have a pile of laundry to do and mail/bills to sort through but I'll get back here soon.

I hope you all had a great Christmas and New Years. May this be a wonderful year for you all.

Getting better, thank you

2006-12-02T08:33:00.000-08:00

Thanks to everyone for the pep talks. I needed to hear that I was normal, or sorta normal. I feel about 75 percent better since that day I posted.

I started working on my individual issues, breaking them down instead of piling them on top of each other. I can't remember which day I posted but since then, I've seen a therapist at the suggestion of my midwife, my lactation consultant, my mother and M. But before I saw her, I spoke with the lactation consultant and decided that I wanted to stop breastfeeding. (I'm probably going to get some La Leche person getting on my blog and harassing me now! lol)
I think the bulk of my issue was that physically I haven't been feeling well and on top of that, feeling like a milk machine and not feeling close to my daughter. I actually felt a bit resentful of the breastfeeding and on top of that, was feeling guilty about stopping breastfeeding. I had placed this high standard on how I wanted to be a mother and I wasn't holding up well. But a number of people said that if I wasn't feeling 100 percent, I wasn't going to be able to give Emer 100 percent and she'd know it. Many of us were formula fed and turned out just fine, including myself and M, and we'd survived. I had given her a month and she was already better off than nothing. So, Thursday I decided I was going to stop. It helped to talk to my lactation consultant and she didn't skip a beat when I told her I wanted to stop. She gave me instructions now on how to dry up my milk. Needless to say, the painful swollen boobs are hardly noticeable now that my mood has lifted. I'm still working on the other issues.. one day at a time.

The biggest difference is that I am enjoying my daughter now. I feel more inclined to hold her, even when she's crying, and trying to figure out what is going on with her. I love seeing her smiles, and she has started to smile a bit. (probably gas but it's okay, we think she's smiling at us!) Last night I was even able to do the late shift with her and survived without M's help, while he went to get a bit of much needed sleep. We've also made plans to go to the San Diego area (my parents) about 5-6 days early to get some much needed sunshine. I think that getting into see the therapist and making decisions about bf helped me out a lot. I still have another appt with the therapist when I return from Ireland so I'm prepared for some of those feelings to linger... but for now, I'm doing much better...

Trouble adjusting

2006-11-27T18:00:00.000-08:00

Here we are, 25 days into the new parent thing. Some days are easier than others. Some days are brutally tough. And I have HELP. I have someone I can turn to when I can't handle anymore. I didn't think it would be so tough. I truly feel for women (and men) who have to do this on their own. It is not an easy task.

I love this little bean. I mean, it's weird to feel like this about someone that you literally just met but I do. But that doesn't mean it's not a challenge. When you just can't figure out why she's crying and you've tried everything... and I don't even think I have a colicky baby, where she cries all the time for no reason. She doesn't cry excessively, it's just an adjustment. But then she smiles at you (it's just gas, I'm sure) and it's all worth it.

I'm still dealing with some issues though. I can't sit for too long, got a bit of pain in the bum. I won't go into details but it's f%^&*&^ painful and when all you have to do in your day is sit. On top of that, apparently I'm possibly bordering on postpartum depression, according to my midwife. She's a little concerned. Here I just thought it was hormones. The stress of learning to deal with a young one and on top of that, not working. I guess it could be more than that - weather, it's been cold, snowing, raining, gross. I need to be more diligent. I haven't been out of the house with just the bun, alone. It feels overwhelming. I'll have to do it soon though - I'm thinking that heading out to a new mother's/baby's group is probably a good idea. I need to know other people are going through some of the same things I am.

I know if physically I felt better, I'd emotionally feel better. Sure, having a bit of warm sunshine wouldn't hurt but it's winter after all.. it ain't going to happen. We've talked about moving down near my parents. I'm trying not to make any rash decisions at this point but it's hard in the thick of things. A few months will go by and I'm sure I won't feel so bad. Things will settle down. I'll look back on this and be surprised. I just have to take one day at a time.

On a bright note, M and I are celebrating our first anniversary on Wednesday. We might even take a friend up on her offer to watch the bean and go out for dinner. What a year it's been! I'm so happy, I've really married my best friend and a wonderful partner in this new phase in our life. Thank you, M. I love you.

Sleeping baby

2006-11-17T14:45:00.000-08:00

How do I get anything done? It seems the day passes and I accomplish nothing aside from breastfeeding the wee one and writing thank you cards for the gifts we've gotten. I haven't actually sent any of those thank you cards, I've just written them. My mom is still doing the bulk of the work - she does laundry, she makes dinner, she cuddles the baby when she's fussy. My mom leaves on Monday. How are we going to do it?

I know the answer to that. We just are. We'll work it out. I'll get off my a$$ and get a bit more organized. I wonder how people go back to work - how do they do it? I want to work a little but the thought of having to breastfeed every 3 hours (the whole process takes between 30-60 minutes depending on whether she eats consistently or rests in between courses!) is keeping me from doing that. And then there's our trip to Ireland. Part of me just wants to rest the whole 3 months. Although I'm sure I'll be stircrazy by then.

It has rained exactly 13 days out of 16 since Emer was born. I don't mean little drizzly rain either, I mean Noah's Ark kind of rain where you are pretty sure you need a snorkel when you go outside. So, suffice it to say, I'm a little depressed. It could be hormones, it could be the weather, it could be this huge life change, it could be not working - it's probably all four of those things. We've talked about moving someplace sunny although I have told M that I won't make any hurried decisions since I'm sure it's just hormones talking right now.

I've noticed exactly how tiny our house is the last few weeks too. Four people and a baby shouldn't share the same space in a house like this. Since we only use one floor currently, we are talking 800 sq feet, approximately. There's no place to get away, especially in this weather. Today is nice, but maybe not nice enough to cheer me up!

I keep meaning to post photos but as I may have said, there aren't a lot of moments when her eyes are open, hence, not a lot of "different" photos. The only thing that changes are the outfits and the blankets. lol I know, I know.... enjoy every moment because they don't come along again... and I am. It's all good.

10 days on...

2006-11-11T11:56:00.000-08:00

I can't believe it's 10 days since she was born. It's also exactly one year since M moved to the U.S. to be with me. Our anniversary is the end of the month. Some would say it's been a busy year. I know I would.

Emer (pronounced Eemer) 's name is Irish. M and I actually had come up with girl names, even though we thought we were having a boy. We went through a lot of girl names, I wanted something short with at least 2 syllables. The name needed to flow. lol Anyhow, at first M wasn't sure about Emer, as it was an ex-girlfriend's name, but to me, it didn't matter. No one has heard the name Emer before - aside from the Irish side - so it's fun to have some 'different'. The name doesn't really have any meaning, in particular. M says that Emer was the queen of mythical Ireland way back when. She's certainly a queen! Rose is my maternal grandmother's name - M came up with the middle name and I think it's perfect. It fits her!

So the first week has been a bit of a trial. We went to the pediatrician on Monday and of course, she'd lost weight. She also was a bit jaundiced which of course, sent her mother into fits of crying (of course, that was hormonal but the guilt didn't hurt to keep it going)... I'd been crying uncontrollably for a few days anyway. I guess the hormones that change after pregnancy were worse for me than the one during pregnancy. Anyhow, after that appt, I asked to see a lactation consultant because we were pretty sure the wee one wasn't eating (it's hard to tell when you are feeding from the boob). We saw her 3 times last week and she gave us some great tips, she also prescribed a breast pump and it seems like my milk is finally in! If dirty and wet diapers are any indication... lol By Friday, she'd gained back 3.6 oz (after losing 12oz) so I'm feeling pretty good about that. We're getting into a routine.

Thank god for my mother and M. They have made life easy for me in the last 10 days. I don't have to cook, clean, and could sleep whenever I want. I have someone to hand off the baby too when she's fussy, someone to change diapers, to help me get in place when I have to breast feed. It's made things sooooo much easier and I'm truly blessed. This morning I was even able to get up with Emer, change her diaper and feed her while everyone else was asleep. It's the little milestones that I'm happy with. I don't know how single mom's do it, even how women without their mom's or husbands do it. If I had to be alone all day, doing it all myself... oh my gosh, I can't even think about it. I definitely have a lot of respect for those mother's out there.

Well, it's about that time.. I need to wrap this up. I'm going to take a quick bath and get ready for the feeding frenzy that commences soon. I can see my little girl making the 'I'm almost awake' movements! I promise more photos later. We still have our damn camera with the constantly dead batteries so we had to take photos with the camera that uses film. Needless to say, we have to get them developed....

I guess I spoke too soon

2006-11-06T08:00:00.000-08:00

As you all know by now, the bun came out of the oven! However I mentioned feeling on Halloween was justified, I really wasn't feeling right. After I finished working, I told M that we had to leave the house because I couldn't sit around feeling like I was - kinda crampy and uncomfortable. I wanted to get my mind off of it and as we needed a smaller place for the bun to sleep, we headed down to Bab1es R u$ (that last s as the dollar sign being particularly fitting!). We bought the thing we were looking for and the lady at the register asked when I was due. I laughed and said, due Friday but might be having him tonight. (See, I still was thinking boy even though the last few days I thought girl was a possibility). We laughed and went on our merry way. I didn't really think I was having him that night. We headed over to Red Robin and had a dinner consisting of mainly junk - chili cheese fries, onion rings and we split a burger. If I'd known I'd be seeing those things later, I probably would've picked some more appetizing colors or something!

We headed home after food - it was probably about 9pm - and I was starting to kind of keep track of the feelings I was having. I thought they might be contractions. It felt like particularly bad menstrual cramps and having not had those since I was 15 or so, it didn't feel good. They started out about every 15 minutes and pretty soon, I was standing up and trying to "breathe through them" because they weren't feeling particularly good. I called the doula about 11:30 (by the way, she didn't pick up right away...argh) and she finally answered after I called a second time. I told her what was going on, the contractions were about 10-11 minutes apart at this point, which means basically I *could've* been in labor or not. We had to wait and see. She told me to get some rest, sleep if I could and drink tons of liquids. Pretty soon, every contraction had me running to the bathroom, thinking I was going to throw up. I didn't at that point. I just knew I needed to.

M and I tried to go to sleep. He had no problem zonking out but every 10 minutes was awakened by me getting up, or getting on all fours to breathe through the contraction. I was making a lot of noise because my yoga breathing was all I could remember to do! I was sure our nextdoor neighbors could hear. Pretty soon, we just gave up sleeping and came back to the living room, listening to music, drinking a cup of tea, trying again to time the contractions. They were at 5 minutes apart for what seemed like quite a while - still, I didn't know if I was in full labor and didn't want to wake my doula for nothing, so we just kept working through them. It was about 2:30 in the morning when I had a contraction that made me lose my dinner. Having been drunk before I knew all about throwing up - god it felt good! lol M was convinced I needed to call the doula so we did. She didn't pick up right away so he called the hospital. They said he could bring me in and we could see how far I was - he felt better about that because he thought I was getting dehydrated. So by the time the doula called, we were packed and heading to the hospital. She was going to meet us there.

We arrived after an uneventful time in the car. It was 3:30am and we laughed about all the times/routes we'd practiced getting there during rush hour. We needn't have worried, there wasn't a spot of traffic out at that time! We arrived and they made me lay on my back - the worst position by the way - to put a couple monitors on my uterus and the baby. It's the law they do this when you come in, for twenty minutes. It was a brutal 20 minutes. Everyone was doing fine, sure enough I was having contractions...

The midwife on call arrived and it was one of our favorites. She checked me out and told me I was 5cm dialated! I had managed to get most of the way at home (which was a goal) and without my doula (not necessarily what I'd hired her for!). I was still not close though - usually it takes 1 hour per cm to dilate - so was forced to lay on my back for what seemed like forever. They decided to move me from the monitoring room to the place I would give birth and stay in afterward. I got the gown on and they found me a birthing ball to sit on. The contractions were intense and uncomfortable. I was still making a LOT of noise to get through them. Because my water hadn't broken, I wasn't allowed to push yet. That was probably the hardest part of it all - not allowed to do something I really needed to do to feel better. I was using all these other breathing techniques I'd never thought I would because they were so silly when we were learning them. But I had to keep from pushing and that's what they did for me.

I guess at one point, I was sitting on the ball and my legs were shaking so hard. I couldn't stop them. I didn't know at the time that this meant I was in transition, the point before you start pushing the baby out. All I knew was that I didn't think I could go much longer. I could feel myself wanting the drugs. lol At one point, they suggested I get on the bed again. I was lying on my left side with M at my face and my doula close by. I don't remember too many details but when my midwife checked me again, I was 10cm dilated. We were surprised at how fast things were moving. It was only 5:30am. It wasn't long before my water broke. God, what a gorgeous feeling!!! Relief for that moment anyway. Now was the work.

I had completely planned on laboring standing up or something else to use gravity to pull the baby out but here I was on my side, really the only position I could be comfortable on. Finally I was allowed to push. My gosh, the sounds that came out of me now! I remember pushing, I remember everyone saying they could see the baby's head, I remember M leaning over and looking at it, I even remember me touching her head. I remember the midwife telling me to change the pushing noises to push down rather than out (I can't explain it better than that) - instead of pushing out with my grunts, the focus needed to be down and out. It seemed to do the trick. Emer came out in about 20 minutes of pushing. The relief was incredible!

The midwife laid her on my chest as I'd asked and we set our eyes on our daughter (by the way, M got to announce it to me) for the first time. I was just amazed and thinking of it now makes me tear up a bit. I had to have a few stitches because she came out pretty fast but I didn't even notice the rest of the labor. We did get a good look at the placenta about an hour later, and I have to say how incredible it is to see something that kept your child alive for 10 months.

Don't worry, we didn't bring it home with us, nor are we cooking it. That's just too gross.

Bun not coming out of the oven...

2006-10-31T10:55:00.000-08:00

I know, I know.. I'm still before my due date. I was hoping for an October baby, go figure. November has never been an exciting month for me. Maybe that's the point. This November will change our lives. Of course, our anniversary is in November and I didn't think twice about that so I can't explain what's up with this. Maybe I just want to see my new son/daughter face-to-face sooner, rather than later. Let's get this party started!

The last few days I've started to think that maybe the bun is actually a girl. For 9 months, we've called him "him" and I admit to wanting a "him" although I'd truly be happy with a healthy child. It's funny how right now I get to see all these ads about statistics of children with autism being born is 1 in 166, and all sorts of other troubles. I start to think of all the random glasses of wine and beer (not a huge amount, mind you, but more than some, I think) I've had, all the cheese I've eaten without thinking if it's pasteurized (I mean, how can you figure out if every cheese you eat is pasteurized - it gets tedious)... But you know what I mean, I start to second guess all the decisions I've made along the way and wonder if my child is going to be born healthy. Whereas for the last 8+ months, I haven't really thought like that at all. The longer it takes for him/her to come out, the more I start to think about that... Which I guess is why I want to see him/her. Her. I don't know, I'm thinking it's a her now. God, my mom will be THRILLED. :))

Happy Halloween everyone!

Not quite there yet

2006-10-26T10:49:00.000-07:00

So after feeling crappy and not getting a bunch of sleep the past few days, I had my doctors appointment yesterday. (Joe, you might want to close your eyes for this next bit..) I had my internal exam and I'm - woo hoo! - 1 cm dialated (9 to go). To be honest, that doesn't really mean anything other than things are getting started. They could go nowhere from here.

My midwife was asking me if the bun was moving or I was having contractions and honestly, after awhile, I just can't tell the difference. Now that I think about it, it's mostly baby moving but in the afternoon and evening, it's non-stop activity which is why I can't tell. So we did a non-stress test which involved hooking us up to a machine where we could monitor the baby's heart rate and monitor contractions by my uterus. I literally sat there for 30 minutes feeling nothing but having the tape register some contractions and some baby movements. There was a little concern but I told them it was normal as I feel most movement after noon and before 10pm at night (it was 11am). On cue, the minute we got in the car to drive home there was a flurry of activity in my stomach which didn't stop until I went to bed! (At least he knows when to calm down for his mom!)

So that's where we are for now. Tap, tap, tapping fingers.... waiting. :)) But getting excited, I have to say. M's almost finished the work he started so maybe that's what the bun is waiting for! :))

I will keep everyone posted, if you want, but I need current email addresses for a few people. Only if you want to hear right away, I have a mailing list setup for M. Mel, I don't have one for you, E- I have a few for you, what's the most current?, Hawaii girl, I need a current one as well. As for getting them to me..... maybe through the LDR email? I don't know if you can find my email setup within blogger and I'm too foggy to figure it out. Maybe through the other blog we have setup? That would work too.

Thanks,

Are we there yet?

2006-10-24T14:06:00.000-07:00

I had a fantastic weekend. Friday night M and I decided to relax at home because we had some plans for the weekend. On Saturday, I had a girly spa day where two friends took me to get a manicure and pedicure - which M proceeded to start ripping down a wall between our kitchen and front room. Yes, I know we talked about no more remodel before the bun but as it hadn't felt like anything was happening, i told him to get started. If we had the baby that day, he could stop working, if we didn't have the baby for a month, he'd have time to finish it all! So he started taking the kitchen cupboards down after we moved the office and refridgerator to create some space for him to work.

Saturday we went to dinner with some good friends and had a lovely evening. I'm uncomfortable all the time now, so sitting for longer than a couple hours is icky. We were home by 10pm. Ah, the days when I could stay out until 11pm! I miss 'em! lol Interestingly enough, the minute I lay down, we're fine, but I'd say the bun is running out of room and sitting isn't working for either of us...

Sunday I went to yoga and the library while M proceeded to tear down more of the house. We had a baby shower of sorts of Sunday night with some friends, it was lovely. I'm not a huge fan of that sort of thing, and I really dislike being the center of attention but fortunately it didn't last long. They made a lovely meal and we got some really cute stuff for the bun - more clothes and bath stuff and a really cool diaper bag. :) Sunday night I was tired but woke up at 3am and couldn't go back to sleep. I went to the couch and watched a bit of tv before falling back to sleep around 4am. I'm just uncomfortable. Full stop.

Yesterday I had to make a last run to a couple of our properties to install some scanners. I have had the scanners at home here for 2 months while we tried to troubleshoot the problems before taking them to the properties they are meant for. As I only have a week before I drop, I told them I was coming out and would set them up as far as I could. Riding in the car isn't fun and I had to go about 35 miles each way. By the time I returned, I was wrecked and spent the rest of the afternoon in bed. I felt like I was getting the flu.

Even after another crappy night's sleep, I feel better today. Not great but better. Hoping that this means maybe the time is soon?

Ok, maybe not

2006-10-17T11:10:00.000-07:00

I have to say I was a little down that day. I *do* love reading everyone's witty and/or thoughtful blogs and it is a nice way to keep in touch with people - well, the six of you that read regularly - lol. So I'll keep going and see if anyone comes back to say hi, now that I've driven you all off! :))

By the way, did I mention I'm feelin' big? Well, yeah, that's what 37 and one half weeks of pregnancy'll do to you. I'm only lucky that it really didn't happen until this last month. I've felt pretty good this whole time, believe me, I know how lucky I am.

So last weekend was a good one. Irish and I had thought about going out of town overnight but didn't, thank god. I would've had a hard time sitting in the car for 3 hours at this point, it's just too uncomfortable. I had made plans with two high school friends for breakfast on Saturday and we met up. It's cool to 'meet' people again - to know them from twenty years ago and then talk to them and find out what they've been up to and find out that it's more similar to you than not. Not that I'm surprised, they were girls I liked in high school for a reason - more left of center than not - so I shouldn't be surprised that I still like them and find them interesting and entertaining. Hopefully we'll make it a regular-ish occurence.

After I left them, I went home and decided to go for a swim. I haven't swam at all during my pregnancy but my midwife mentioned something about turning the baby so he wasn't lying on my right side anymore. Apparently swimming is something really good for that - the weightlessness and the gravity of swimming facedown pulls his back towards my tummy... I don't know if it works at all but it felt LOVELY. I took two of those water noodles and put them under my armpits and I did laps of the breast stroke. It wasn't really 'work' or even exercise, it was pleasure. Pure and simple weightless pleasure. I'm going again today. :)

The rest of the weekend was very relaxing. The weather was dreary which made for laying around watching movies the perfect Sunday. We made banana pancakes, read the Sunday paper and checked out "Inside Man" on Pay-on-Demand. It was a pretty good film, I have to say. It was wonderful and relaxing weekend. The last of them, I'm sure. But we're taking advantage while we can.

Giving up the ghost

2006-10-09T10:37:00.000-07:00

I don't know if this title fits what I'm thinking but I'll give it a go. I've been keeping this blog for about a year - the other about a year before that - and I'm getting to the point where I'm thinking that there are some reaaaallly good writers out there, and I'm not one of them. I have an interesting life - to me!- but I can't take the time to sit down and put these things into words like some of the bloggers I read.

Now that I'm about to have a bun, I can imagine that my blog is going to consist of bun-like topics whether I like it or not and I'm not sure I want to subject anyone to that. I'm worried for my friends locally because I already find that my topic of conversation is limited. I know, I know.. you are going to say it's such a big part of my life and it should be important but I'm a little bored by it all. I'm boring myself (!) and that's not good.

So I'm thinking I might shut down this blog for awhile and just keep commenting on the blogs I read, the real people who are witty and entertaining. Maybe I shouldn't make any snap decisions at this point but I would tell those of you who actually read this occasionally that you have about a month before I write again. I'll post a photo of the bun, but after that..... well, I need to think about it. And I'll keep reading you - so you won't be missing me!!! :))

Friday afternoon musings

2006-09-29T12:06:00.000-07:00

To start off with, Mel, a doula is like a helpful support person (in addition to your labor nurse and your midwife/OB who help with the delivery but not the natural form of pain management) during your delivery. This is someone I hire, in an effort to keep my birth natural, to help myself and Irish navigate through the hard bits by helping me keep breathing, keep changing positions, keep natural. Apparently, doula's first came into being out here in Seattle although a lot of people don't use them. But the statistics say that doula's help with the birth experience and help keep the level of intervention down if it's not needed by just being supportive. Most people would probably have just their husbands/partners and I'm pretty sure M could manage but on the off chance I have a 30 hour labor, even he's going to need a rest! Of course, it could be so painful that I'm screaming for drugs in the first 10 minutes and then I've wasted a chunk of cash, but there you go. It's worth it to me.

Can I just say what a beautiful morning it is here? As you may remember, I look out at the water from my office and it was quite foggy this morning. As M says, 'we must not have paid our bill because the view is gone!'. But slowly, the fog is changing, it's still hovering over the water but we can see the mountains and islands in the far distance and the blue sky. We can hear fog horns from the ships passing by and that is really cool. What a gorgeous fall day!

...an hour later... returning from a walk down by said water. sigh. What a lovely day.

I'm so mellow now, I don't have much more to say. Have a great weekend!

back on the upswing.

2006-09-22T11:30:00.000-07:00

After a week of feeling tired all the time and sick if I'm not stuffing food into my mouth, I finally feel back to normal. Both of things probably led me to a 3 pound weight gain in 3 weeks (I know, I know, I'm pregnant, it's okay) because I wasn't up for the gym AND I just kept eating everything in sight. But whatever I did must've worked because I finally feel better. I was able to get up this morning and go to the gym and I haven't felt the need to eat that last little bit of banana bread that my husband made. Well, not yet. Anyhow, I think it was a bit of sleeping in (amazing what an extra hour and a half does for you) and taking time off from the gym, maybe I managed to avoid a cold or something. Whatever, it's all good.

The weather has been bloody dreary here lately. It's that time of year when the mornings are darker and the evenings get darker earlier and in a place like the northwest where you might get a bit of rain and cloud cover, these days feel even shorter. And it's only September! I remember the days when September was a great month in Washington. Sigh. Now I sound old... "I remember the days..." jaysus!

Besides the sleeping/eating issue this week, we've managed to interview and decide upon a birth doula. I don't know if anyone is familiar with doulas but they are meant to help you through your labor, basically assisting you and your partner in whatever capacity that you need. Because I'm hoping to go 'natural' (a girl can always hope), having a doula increases the percentage likelihood of this happening in a variety of ways. If it's a long labor, it'll help M out as well, giving him a break every now and then too. I don't know why I got so set on doing things "naturally" but there you go. I guess maybe I want to know my body can do it.

Continuing on the same theme, we are meeting with 2 other couples from our childbirth class. They live in our neighborhood and you never know when you're going to need some support or even a babysitter or whatever. They are both due before we are but only a couple weeks. It'll be nice to know someone going through the same thing we are - as we don't have any friends in this stage of life.

So that's it. No much else happening. Oh yay, the sun is coming out. HALLELUJAH!

What a week!

2006-09-13T17:25:00.000-07:00

First of all... I got to meet Ang and Colby! I have to say, I *love* when people say 'let's get together' and then THEY DO. It's not just "talk" and it happens. Don't get me wrong, I know things come up and sometimes it's impossible and I wouldn't hold that against anyone, but I truly love it when the stars and planets and people align and it clicks.

Ang and I emailed back and forth about maybe getting together while she was here for 10 days or so. We exchanged cell phone numbers and said 'let's see what we can do'. It truly couldn't have worked better for us. My mom was flying in later in the day on Saturday, we were in the process of cleaning our house (so it looked a bit cleaner than usual), and she called when we were at Costco so we picked up a couple quiches and asked them to meet at our place. Luckily for us, they weren't picky about what they had because they seemed to like the quiche and salad! lol

Delightful couple, I must say. I felt like I knew Ang already, through the various ways our paths crossed online and it was fun to put a face with the name. And no matter what anyone says about showing a different side online, the friendly outgoing side that I know of Ang was there in person as well. Colby I didn't know so much about but I have to say he was incredibly nice. Especially since he was probably wondering why he had to meet these old folks for lunch when he didn't even know them! lol He's one of those people who really looks at you when you're talking and I like that too. They were very cool and I'm glad they stopped by. I hope Ang was able to get a bit of shopping in downtown as well!

Besides that, my mom arrived on us for a few days, which was great. She's a great guest as she kind of does her own thing while we work during the day. And she made food, which we LOVE.
I seriously appreciate having a nice meal cooked and ready for me. M does it all the time so it was nice for him to get a break as well by having my mom cook. Yum! On top of that, she kind of served as the baby stuff advisor. M and I had a carseat and stroller picked out but she gave the thumbs up which motivated us to actually "purchase" the thing. She also helped get all sorts of gear for the wee one together - blankets, bibs, towels, etc. All that stuff you need. Thank god because I'm not sure I could've gotten it together to organize it. When I'm given an overwhelming task like that sometimes I just procrastinate. OK. I'll always procrastinate. The kid would've been arriving home in a pillowcase or something.. lol So that's all set.

Well, I'm off now.

Just call me 'chubby'

2006-09-07T13:31:00.000-07:00

I look tired. That's all I can say about this photo. Tired. I don't feel too tired but maybe that day I did. (Obviously I don't get that way from cleaning my room, as you might notice my room is a pit if you were looking past me in the photo!)

All is well out here. We are keeping busy going out with our friends without kids (while they'll still see us!) and picking up the odd kids items from other friends. My mom is coming into town for a long weekend and we are hoping she'll motivate us to pick up some more odds and ends. I'm telling you, the amount of shite that you can buy for a bun is overwhelming. We strongly believe in second hand items but I'm guessing a little t-shirt can only be thrown up on so many times before it isn't any good any more! lol And we're not really fans of the hand-me-down carseat or stroller. Most people have these 4X4 pickup type strollers and we are NOT interested in that so we've been good and said no. Just because it's free doesn't mean we need to bring it home with us!

As for me, I'm still feeling good, most of the time. A little more tired than average but that's to be expected. Going to the gym in the morning still but the heart rate jumps up fast and I feel like I'm moving in slow motion to keep it down to the recommended beats per minute. But I'd rather go than not, it can only help me during labor - at least that's what I am telling myself. Plus, if I don't workout, I drag even more through the rest of my day. So, it's a necessity.

The bun is moving around like crazy, it's like having an almost perpetual upset stomach that you can't do anything about. But 'he' isn't keeping me up at night so that's good. And I'd much rather have him moving than not. But still... I'll be glad to have my body back.

Aside from all things child related, we have halted plans on our remodel. We got the first bid, so to speak, and we started to wonder if it was really worthwhile to change our lifestyles for the sake of some more space. Meaning, it cost enough to make us reconsider. lol We are batting around the idea of re-doing the current space we have, which would cost us considerably less and M could do a majority of the work.. Anyhow, like we don't have enough to think about, now we have that too! Fun, fun!

Oh, I just realized I better take off for my dental appt. I will write more later!! Cheers

Relief

2006-08-28T16:04:00.000-07:00

Holy cow, only 10 more weeks. I can't believe how quickly time is going by during this pregnancy. Aside from a desire to sleep on my stomach again, it has been easy. I've been lucky. I know I've said this a hundred times before. I'll say it again. I feel blessed!

I had the 3 hr glucose test for gestational diabetes. It was a long day. Get into the lab at 7:30 with no coffee or food (since 10:30 the night before, not TOO bad) and get my blood drawn. Drink something similar to Sprite and sit down to wait. M came with me and we sat there reading and occasionally chatting. Every hour someone would look at me and say, 'it's time' and I'd go back and get my blood drawn again. By 10:30, it was over. I didn't feel as crappy as the first time I did it. I was all set to get a warm lunch but their cafeteria was in-between breakfast and lunch so I had to settle for cereal. Bah! By the time I got to my 11:00 appt with the midwife though, I figured it must've been good, as I only gained 1/2 a pound.

Not much happened at the appointment, we met our 3rd of 5 midwives in the group. She was pretty nice and answered all our questions but heck, that's their job! lol We go again in 3 weeks...

Other than the obvious impending birth of our child, we've been taking it easy. I have been anyhow. M is still working on the bedroom remodel and it's looking good. He should have it finished in time for my mom's visit in 2 weeks. We took a drive Saturday, looking at houses.
We are always looking even though we are planning on the remodel. You never know when you're going to get good ideas, or even when you're going to find something you like better.
We were driving through a rather populated area near the water and saw some open houses. New houses but we stopped anyway. They were brutal, who needs 4500 sq ft of living space, I ask you that? We continued on down the street and were looking at some stables and a couple farmhouses. I made M drive down to one of the farmhouses because it was gorgeous. Like something you'd see in the midwest (well, my tv version of the midwest) - wrap around porch, beautiful big lot. And there it was. The sign -For Sale By Owner. A little more than a stone's throw from the water (turns out it didn't have water access at the lot, but rather down the street). We fell in love with it. We called about it and she was showing it on Sunday. Ah heck, we went for a look. You couldn't beat the location or the house - it looked like something that belonged in the country and it was in the city. The woman selling it had the whole history - it had actually been moved from a location right next to the water back to this location. Needless to say, the walls we all cracked.. It was an odd house. At one hand you saw the potential but on the other hand, it wasn't a house you wanted to change too much. Too pretty. Too idyllic. Great price. After an hour of day dreaming, we left. It was not.quite.The.One. But it definitely turned our heads.

Rant

2006-08-18T17:07:00.000-07:00

I know, I know. I haven't written in awhile. I'd be surprised if anyone is still checking up on here to see if there's a new post. I don't know why I've been so lazy, maybe, like my good friend Anonymous G, I just don't know why I'm posting anymore. My days are quiet and boring and I really don't want to bore everyone out there in blogland. Moreover, I bore myself right now. I guess I'm having the 29 week blahs or something.

Last Saturday night, we went out in search of the perfect Guinness yet again. Poor Irish hasn't had a decent pint since he's moved to this side of the pond. And frankly, he still hasn't. It's not like he drank the stuff that much in Ireland but, as he said, at least he knew if he went out and wanted a Guinness, there was a pretty good chance he knew a place that had a good one. There is a huge difference between a good pint/good pour and a bad one. In Ireland, it takes about 10-15 minutes to get your Guinness. Because we, as americans, like immediate gratification, finding a place that takes that long to serve you a beer is unheard of. The guinness loses it's creamy texture and sheer yumminess when it's poured like a Bud. Add that to cold and watery and it's just a bummer. Yes, we've found one place - thanks to my blogger buddy Joe we had some lovely Guinness while visiting NYC. But I find it a little expensive to fly out to NYC everytime the hubby needs his fix. I understand fixes. I always missed my tortilla chips and salsa while I was in Ireland. So, back to the story. We went out in search of Guinness and we stopped at about 4 pubs. There was some food involved ( I tend to nibble on appetizers so I can have a sip or two of the dark stuff) but there were a lot of pints. Poor Irish just isn't used to going out on the tear anymore. Let's just say he had a very rough Sunday, very, very, very rough. I'm pretty sure I heard him hack up a lung at one point. I don't miss those days. For once, I was very glad I was pregnant.

On the same day last weekend, we ate the world's best donuts. I don't even LIKE donuts usually but I have to say that these were absolutely gorgeous. If you ever come across a Top Pot donuts in your travels, stop in and have one. Oh gosh, I'm drooling just thinking of them....

Other moments this week, glucose testing for gestational diabetes. I took a 1 hr test and failed. Which means I have to go to the more extensive 3.5 hour test. This requires me to fast overnight, get up (without coffee or food) and go into the lab to have blood drawn. Then I get to drink a high sugar content drink and wait around for 3 hours while my blood is drawn once an hour. Ick. I feel really let down by my body, I have to say. I eat healthily, I workout, I don't drink soda, I drink 4 liters or so of water a day, I'd like to think that I would be able to handle a little sugar. But NOOOO. I feel very let down. I'm trying not to dwell because I've truly been lucky this whole pregnancy, not an ounce of morning sickness or any of the weird sh~t that people complain about. The fact that I still get to the gym every day and feel pretty good means a lot. If I have to watch my diet a bit because of this, I won't complain. But there's still that nagging feeling that my body should've been able to handle this. Sigh. Ah well. Hopefully I'll be able to handle the actual childbirth better than this! lol

Huh. I was going to rant about my job but it just doesn't seem like the right time now. It's Friday, after all, time to close up shop and head home. In my case, move away from my desk.
I have a lovely massage scheduled tomorrow so I'll probably forget all about my work rant by next week! You've been saved! :)

Quiet times

2006-08-03T09:57:00.000-07:00

Finally, the weather has cooled off a notch or two. We can sleep again. Yay!

My mom was visiting last week for our birthdays. Mine is the day before hers and they both fell on the weekend, which was unusual. Because my whole life, I've probably gotten the party and the special dinner, and she's gotten the half eaten cake, etc, we decided to share the weekend. I would've loved to have given her both dinner out AND the cake but in my present state, I wouldn't have been able to enjoy either because I have to eat smaller portions. So we did cake on my day, dinner out on hers. I think she was okay with that. And I certainly was. Being a Leo, you know, it's all about ME! lol

I bought her one of those little paper hats that you get for a small child's birthday, that said "Birthday Princess" in pink with a little ruffle. She actually wore it all day, which was hilarious. We joked that people probably thought we had to check her out from the 'home' to see this lady in her mid-##'s wearing a child's tiara. We had gotten so used to it by dinner that when two men walked by the window of the restaurant and knocked on the glass and pointed at her mouthing Happy Birthday, we had no idea what they were talking about. Then we realized she was wearing the Birthday Princess hat and we all started laughing. It was sweet of them to wish her a happy day. I think she enjoyed it. Amongst other little gifts, we bought her a massage - it's so hard to buy for a parent, thinking of something that they might not do for themselves... I think we nailed it on the head with that one, she really loved it.

Interestingly enough, I got clothes. lol Irish bought me some cool maternity tops (which actually make me look more pregnant than I am - I think I'm in denial - lol) and some workout shorts. My mom bought me a realllllly soft fleecy type robe for when I have to get up in the middle of the night and feed the bun. It's gorgeous but unfortunately, the wrong size so I need to return it. She also got to satisfy herself by buying another baby outfit - she called it a layette - in yellow. Pretty cute.

Also, since she was here on the day of our 26 week appt, she came into the room with us when we saw the midwife. We had the best midwife yet, she was from the Isle of Man and had a great accent, and was the first one to acknowledge Irish in these appts. I mean, I know I'm the one that's pregnant and all but it would be nice to see anyone there be friendly to him. Well, it WAS nice. She was funny though and kept saying 'I promise we'll get to you' (to me) and then asking Irish some question about something... I had to laugh because it didn't bother me at all. She even asked my mom if this was her first grandchild... It's so nice when they have some personality - the medical staff. Unfortunately, she only works one day a week and is on call only one day a week as well, so the chance that she'd be delivering me is one in seven. Pretty slim. So next time we see a different midwife.

But I digress. So my mom was here for the appt and we all got the hear the heartbeat, really strong. I actually lost a pound, which was due to the fact that I've been watching what I eat more carefully (don't worry, I've gained 18 so the baby isn't starving). Of course, I felt like I had to explain myself when secretly I was happy that I was no longer gaining out of control. At this point, the bun is just meant to be putting on weight but even then I should only gain a pound a month. If I can keep it to a minimum, I'd be happy. Twenty five pound gain should be more than adequate.

(Oh god, I just realized this blog has become about my pregnancy. I'm sooo sorry. There IS more to me, there IS! Uh, let me think of something... lol)

One more thing, we got a call the other day, some man speaking a foreign language. He called no less than 7 times, probably more. Now, I don't know about you but if I dial the wrong number, I *may* call one more time, thinking I pushed the wrong number in there. But not SEVEN times. Irish finally told him to 'f#$% off' and surprisingly, he didn't call again. lol

That's all. I'm truly sorry at how boring this post is. I promise some excitement next time. And less pregnancy talk.

I'm MELTING....

2006-07-24T15:36:00.000-07:00

I've just realized what the worst part of working from home is... no A/C. The best part of that, I can take cold showers all day if I want to. And eat ice cream. Well, Skinny Cow ice cream sandwiches (only 140 cal).

The weather has been unusually warm lately. We went across the state this weekend to my home town and the hottest temp we ran into - 111 degrees (that's 44 degrees to those of you downunder). Fortunately, most of the time it was 103 and thank god we have a/c in our car. We did the drive in about 5 hours, stopped for lunch in hickville in a lovely air conditioned building. It took about 30 minutes on the road before I started to feel like the blueberry girl from Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory. Remember she ballooned up to the size of a big blueberry or something like that? Yeah, that's how I felt shortly after lunch. We had to stop in another exceeding small town in hickville, wa so that I could buy some... ahem.. gas-relieving tablets.. and walk it off, so to speak. It was PAINFUL. And 105 degrees there, so that was a lot of fun.

Upon arriving at our cute little boutique hotel with air conditioning, we collapsed for a nap and barely woke up in time to walk to the first reunion event. Actually, I had a really good time. I talked to alot of people - mostly the women for some reason, which I'm still wondering about. I didn't seek out to chat with too many men. Irish was a great sport and I parked him down with a few 'spare parts' as they called themselves, while the girls and I wandered around chatting with everyone. I couldn't believe it but we stayed for 5 hours. I saw people I hadn't seen in.. well, 20 years... most of them I hadn't seen in that long. I hadn't even been to my hometown in 10 years.
It was exhausting too, let me tell you. All that chat about nothing. I don't think I know much more than the following items about my fellow classmates:
1. They have all been married at least 10 years.
2. Many have at least 3 kids (which surprised me, really) and quite a few have twins.
3. The women have aged MUCH better than the men.

Let's see, I guess that's it. After all that, this was the information that was imparted. Most could not tell I was pregnant and there was not another single girl there in my 'season of life' - I guess you could say. Most had their kids young.

The next day, Irish and I took a walk through the park, before the heat of the day appeared. My hometown was host to the 1974 World's Fair Expo, so they have a lovely riverfront park. We wandered around and took breaks in the shade and it was nice to see how some things never change. After that, we drove out to my old 'hood, saw my old house, which I'd lived in for 15 years. What a nice neighborhood it was, I have to say. We drove up the hill to where the rich kids lived and I was shocked by the amount of new homes going in. And cheap. (Not that I'd ever live there but it was definitely cheap!) Finally we drove out to Couer d'Alene, Idaho - used to be a sleepy lake/beach town but it was hopping on what must have been the hottest day of the year so far. We had lunch and stuck our tootsies in the lake for a while, then ran as fast as we could back to our air conditioned hotel for another nap.

The second event on Saturday evening was a dinner/dance. There were a few different people here but mostly the same crowd. The nice part was that you could actually sit down and have a chat with whomever was at your table. I sat with a girl I'd known since pre-pre-school days and another girl I'd known since the 6th grade. Catching up with them was very cool. I'd love to keep in touch with them but you know how that goes.. Again we stayed for about 5 hours and I talked to many people. I was so relieved to go home though. It truly is exhausting. Some people haven't changed a bit (personality-wise) which is unfortunate. The same people hung out with the same people they did in high school. I can only wonder though, can you really like those same people or is it just BECAUSE they knew you then that you gravitate towards them. I tried to talk to everyone, mostly because I am a completely different person now than I was then. But you could definitely see the cliques forming, which was an interesting vision. I'm glad I'm home.

Now I can see why they only do that once every 10 years, any sooner would be far too much.

Embarrassing story #5,923,233

2006-07-12T14:37:00.000-07:00

Ok, not my embarrassing story. But too funny to pass up. I asked Irish if I could mention it here and he said no problem.

So we bought a couple webcams. One for us and one for Irish's sister. The idea is to be able to transmit video and photos of the bun or even talk using the computer. I had set it up on my work computer and tested the microphone and ear piece. We set up the other one on the other laptop to test before L went home.

I don't know if you all know how this works but being as most of you have been in long distance relationships, you probably do. I use Yahoo Messenger to connect and then 'Invite the person to view my webcam'. Then the other person uses Yahoo Messenger to connect and Invites me to view their webcam. And then we chat or call and we can see each other while we are talking. It can be fun.

So, in my first attempt to invite Irish to view my webcam, I accidently clicked on my parent's messenger account. I didn't think anything of it, because I figured if my dad or mom accepted, they'd just see me sitting there, nothing big. Right after that, I clicked on Irish's login name and he accepted my connection. But unfortunately, we couldn't get the microphone working so I went into the other room to work on his computer. He was goofing off and the next thing I knew, he was flashing his boy bits at me on the camera on my computer!!! I said, 'uh. I think my parents might be viewing that..' and the next moment the camera was turned towards the wall and poor Irish was curled on the couch in embarrassment!

A bit later I connected again and my dad was online. I chatted with himself and my mom. My dad made a comment/joke (I can't remember what it was) that could've possibly meant that he saw something he shouldn't have but it could've easily been innocuous. We chatted about 10 minutes and got offline.

Poor Irish spent the evening wracked with embarrassment. In fact, we couldn't look at each other without bursting into laughter at the thought that my parents might've seen the Irish jewels! Of course he blames me but I told him *I* wouldn't have gone flashing my bits at any camera, I just would've gone in the other room and done it to him in person!

The house to myself....

2006-07-09T16:25:00.000-07:00

I have an afternoon free... ahhhhhhh.... let's see, what did I do? spent a nice long hour at the gym, came home and took a nice cold shower (it's pretty warm here right now), made myself a lovely salad... earlier I did a bit of cleaning... it's so nice. Irish took his sister to do a harbor cruise, which was nice of him. He hadn't been before and I had, so I decided to take a little time for myself. Three weeks is a little long to entertain someone, especially when she doesn't seem so inclined to do much herself. It's the complete opposite of when our last guests were here - they took care of themselves and when we planned something, they seemed to enjoy it. M's sister doesn't like to ride in the car very long (that leaves out a bunch of cool places to see in this area as most are at least an hour away), she doesn't eat very exotically (can't take her out to dinner because it's hard to find plain chicken, pizza with no cheese, salmon with no sauce...), and she only wants to shop (we both hate shopping, as you may remember). Don't get me wrong, I really like her, she's a nice girl but as we've both commented, there's not a wonder that she's still single at 41 because she's a bit.too.much.work. We are looking forward to having our own space back.

Tomorrow we are having an ultrasound. We decided to do it because our new midwive suggested it. Just to see how the bun is developing. I feel him a bit more these days, although Irish hasn't felt him since that first day.. don't know if I mentioned it but it was right after partaking of a Reese's PB cup.. the little one was doing a tap dance or something. It was pretty cool but most of the time it just feels like gas. lol I still feel great, I still am going to the gym and I started a pre-natal yoga class. THAT feels really good. I hope I can keep them both up because I think it really alleviates the aches/pains and well, it keeps my mood up. Now if I could just stop gaining so much weight! lol (oh wait, I'm *supposed* to do that!)

Work is going great. I'm really enjoying working from home. I know I work more than I would if I was in the office... When I went there in mid June, I managed to head out for smoke breaks (they smoked, I just chat and wave the smoke away from myself) with the group at least 10 times a day (at 10-15min a shot, that's a lot of wasted day). Now, I don't ever get stopped in the hall or the kitchen when I'm getting coffee and shoot the breeze for a few minutes. And I almost never get people coming to my desk and talking to me either. So I probably work more than I would if I were there. Which is fine. I want to keep the job so I'm making sure they have no reason to wonder why they hired me!

My high school reunion is in a couple weeks. TWENTY years. Jaysus. I didn't think I'd ever get to be THIS age. lol I pretty much hated high school so I didn't go to the 10 year. But I'm looking forward to seeing some of the people. If nothing else, I'll get to show Irish the town I grew up in and never want to live in again. I've already re-connected with some friends from that era, it'll be fun to see them in person. And if nothing else, it'll be a lovely night out with my favorite man. :))

Pregnancy rant

2006-06-27T16:16:00.000-07:00

Well, not really a rant per se.. Or maybe it is.

I've become addicted to pregnancy message boards. I read iVillage's and another called Babyfit, that has a good calorie counter so I can see how many calories I'm overindulging on. What constantly amazes me is that not one person has any of the minimal issues I have and not one person mentions what an amazingly easy pregnancy they're having. I'd love to see that. Maybe I should be the first.

All the typical ailments associated with pregnancy... I don't have 'em. Aside from a backache when I sit too long (not a big deal), a dull ache on the right side of my upper ribs and a fluttering right next to that achy spot, I feel good. I'm not complaining, I'm so happy that I haven't been bothered by a lot of the issues that the girls on those sites have. I'm truly blessed. But as it is with those boards, you go there for support and I guess I'd like some support for those of us who don't have problems. Because the fact that I don't have any problems, makes me feel like there must be a BIG one. lol

I spend the 30 or so days between appointments waiting for the next one so I can hear the little heartbeat. I'm patiently waiting for a kick or two to let me know things are as they should be... I don't worry that I'm behind the rest of the world (at least, I don't think I'm worried.. I'm certainly aware). I know I need to break the addiction to the message boards, certainly it's not helping at all. But I keep thinking that eventually, someday, there will be a girl on there with few issues and I'll be able to say "me too". And then we'll both get blasted by the general population and have to slink out of the room quietly. lol

Ok, that's my rant. On a happy note, because I like to end things how I feel, the weather is fantastic in town today and for the last few days and for the coming week. Maybe, for once, we'll have a clear and sunny 4th of July.

Working hard or hardly working?

2006-06-22T12:44:00.000-07:00

I don't think this photo really does my view justice. Suffice it to say, I don't have a hard time sitting at my desk and looking out at the water. Not hard at all. It helps that I don't have a phone yet, so my electronic leash only extends as far as the laptop. I can move around all over the house, then come back to check and see if I've received any email. It's kind of nice. I'm trying to be good and conscientious, irish can't believe that I actually stay at my desk til 6pm. He's constantly inviting me to go for a walk or something during the middle of the day. I have to say 'uh.. i'm WORKing' and that sort of thing. I figure if I'm good now, I won't get questioned as much later, if I decide to take a long lunch or something. I don't want anyone wondering what I'm doing and why I'm getting paid this much to do it, I want to contribute and let everyone know I'm here!

Besides work, not much else has changed. Irish's sister will be visiting in less than a week. That should be interesting. I'm glad I'm working because she's a shopper and will want to go shopping. Irish will have "fun" doing that. I head back to Nor Cal for an overnight trip next week and we have our 22 week appointment at the doctor. Frankly, I find the appointments pretty routine, I guess we just don't have a lot of questions. All they do is take my BP and weigh me.. I keep hoping something else will happen but I guess that's off in the future sometime. We are meeting with a midwife this time, I just haven't been so thrilled with my OB and when they conveniently called to reschedule, I suggested that I'd been wanting to talk to a midwife. So, we'll see if there's any difference or just an extension of the medical side of birthing. The HMO I'm with seems pretty pro 'natural birth', low C-section rates, blah-de-blah-de-blah but it IS a medical facility so who knows what they'll be pushing.. Can you tell I've actually been reading?
I know all the moms out there will probably say the same thing my mom did "TAKE THE DRUGS" and in all honesty, I will probably need them but I'd like to go in thinking that I will try every possibility to suffer..erm..do it naturally. I don't really know my tolerance for pain since I've never really been hurt... I'll probably end up being a wuss... But it's worth a try...

Ok, before you nod off, I'll close this post and visit again soon when something exciting happens. lol

lovin' it

2006-06-16T16:48:00.000-07:00

I just got paid for 2 weeks of goofing off. Pretty much. As you may have read in the last entry, I read a bit of documentation and "got used to" working the hours of 9-6. And then I got paid for it! Right on!

Last Sunday I had to fly to the Bay Area for work. I went on Sunday because my brother was going to be there. He's not one to travel to visit his family but he DOES visit online motorcycle friends and help them replace their motorcycle engines. If family happens to be around, he'll see us. lol Seriously, it's true. And no, I'm not bitter. lol But actually, I'm glad I made the effort (like I wouldn't) because it was the nicest time I've spent with him in years. It was just him (no wife, no kid, no computer to contend with) and we actually had a lovely conversation. It's only been a year since I've seen him but seemed like much longer since I've actually talked to him.

I had at least 3 mexican meals in the 4 days I was there... yum, yum. I'm convinced that it's just too far over the border up here in Seattle, that's why there isn't any good mexican food. With that theory though, you'd think there'd be a lot more great Canadian food. (What is that exactly?) Besides that, I visited with a couple friends and I fit right back into my old office like I'd never left (it's been 5 years). Although the department has doubled since I was there, I know everyone and it feels like a family. It's pretty cool. Still... I'm glad to be working from home (a bit too much chocolate available whenever I want it).

I got home on Wednesday night and have been trying to settle into working. I haven't had a lot to do yet but I imagine once we figure out exactly what my role is, it'll work out. In the meantime, I like working from the couch, or the deck, or my office. I like taking a break out and talking to my friend that is visiting from the Bay Area. I especially love looking out my window at the view when I should be working. Maybe next week when the kitchen is clean, I'll show you a photo of my view....

For now though, you just get a shot of the 20 week belly.

Not sure what there is to say

2006-06-09T09:55:00.000-07:00

I started work this week. I can see this is going to be tough, disciplining myself to keep working when I am used to making my own schedule. This week, during work hours, I went to my personal trainer and had a massage (that took up 5 hours because I had to drive about 30 minutes each way and then wait 'over there' because the girl doing the massage wasn't available for an hour after my training session. I didn't want to drive 30 minutes home just to go back a half an hour later.). Then the next day, I had a long lunch date with an old high school friend, again 30 minutes drive out to meet her and a hour and a half lunch. It's weird because when I used to work in the office, I would sometimes take hour and a half lunches and it didn't bother me. But I felt a bit guilty this week, even though I don't really have anything to do at the moment. I won't be scheduling so much in the future but I can see it's going to be hard going back to that line of thinking... that my hair appts have to be in the evenings or weekends, that my yoga class needs to start as late as possible, that I have to get to the gym before my 9am start time.... On the other hand, I'm getting paid. Always a good thing. And I'm getting a salary that's probably higher than anything I can get in Seattle. And all I have to do is sit home and answer calls and emails with the occasional run out to a property to solve a hardware issue that can't be fixed over the phone. Not such a bad trade off, is it? As with most things, it's the change that takes the most getting used to, the newness of something. I'm sure in a few weeks, when I've gotten into the swing of things and I'm answering calls and emails from the comfort of my sunny deck, I'll be fine. Don't cry for me, Argentina. I'll be okay. lol

I gotta meet risiblegirl, I gotta meet risiblegirl...

2006-06-02T17:41:00.000-07:00

I seem to think I'm some sort of champ, having actually met 4 people that I 'met' online... Risiblegirl is my latest and I have to say, she's pretty darn cute. We met for a mexican lunch during her lunch hour and she's just like her blog. Friendly, chatty, smart and pretty. I can't wait til we get together along with Anonymous G because I know they'll LOVE each other. :)) (Having met both, I'm the expert, right?) lol RG, I hope we get to see you and hubby sometime soon, thanks for meeting up!

So, other than that, I started work this week. Because it was sooner than expected, there isn't much for me to do yet. In fact, they're still working out the details of my job. But I had some reading to do and I think I managed to sit down for two hours and concentrate but that was all I could manage. I think working at home could be dangerous! In an attempt to acclimate before I actually have to sit in my home office, I have gotten up early (6:30am) and headed for the gym by 8am (job starts at 9). I haven't quite made it home by the 9am start time but since there isn't a lot for me to do, no one seems to notice. But I'm working on it. I haven't done this work thing in awhile and getting back into the swing of things is going to be a challenge. Just getting a home office set up should be interested as eventually the whole house will be a work zone. But they've sent me a printer and a docking station and a flat screen monitor, so I guess I need to make it look like I'm actually working! Might help a bit if Irish left the house for work but it's so easy to chat with him and have lunch with him and do.. other..things (blush!) with him during the workday... We'll see how all this goes. Have a great weekend everyone!

Disappointing photos...

2006-05-31T17:45:00.000-07:00

We finally developed our photos from the cruise. For whatever reason, I don't think we captured the beauty of Alaska... it could have been the dull days - bad light - there just wasn't the contrast that there was in real life. I'll post a few here and see what I can do about the others.

Tracy Arm Fjord

Bald Eagle

Tracy Arm Fjord

Our train to White Pass

There's more.. on the other computer.. I haven't edited them yet. They might show a bit more of the majesty of the Tracy Arm Fjord. Sheer granite faces and this narrowing path between them that somehow our giant ship was able to not only able to manuever through but turn around in. The driving of that vessel was a thing of beauty, I have to say.

Besides that, I just want to mention that I am once again employed. My old boss (re: friend) hired me to work for her again. She basically created a position for me because she wanted to hire me back. And she's paying me way more than people make in this position in Seattle. I can't complain! I get to work from home (good and bad points) and I get to stay mostly local. Now, having said that, I have to go to PA in 2 weeks for 3 days and again a week later for a day. But other than that... it's pretty sweet!

On an very exciting note, I get to meet Risiblegirl tomorrow. I hope I don't call her that. lol

Back home, no photos yet

2006-05-23T09:58:00.000-07:00

Just a quick note to let you all know we made it back safely. I think Irish and I are still reeling in wonder from the fact that we agreed to go on a cruise and found it to be exactly as we expected. Not to say that the scenery wasn't fantastic and the food plentiful, that our Irish friends weren't terrific to travel with, because they were and it was. What made two world travelers who searched out exotic faraway places on the cheap, steered away from tourist traps (for the most part, because really, Machu Picchu is a bit of a tourist trap) and other Americans because we wanted a different perspective... what made us go on a cruise is still mind-boggling to us... and I think it's going to take a week or so to recover...

I have a few photos but they are on the other computer and not uploaded yet. I promise to work on that today because it's dreary and wet outside and it seems like the perfect day to do this!

6 months in a leaky boat...

2006-05-13T14:21:00.000-07:00

Well, not exactly. Try 7 days on a cruise ship. Not quite the same thing. We are heading out tonight to Alaska - the ship sails at 10pm. We are a little concerned about the sheep-like quality of a vacation such as this but hopefully, it won't be so bad. We've never done an organized style trip and it'll be interesting to see if we like it. But with the beautiful vistas of glaciers in the background and icebergs in the foreground (hopefully not too close!), I'm sure we can ignore the rest of it. lol Don't worry.. there will be many photos - with M's camera and our digital (charging the batteries as we speak and bringing the charger with us!) - we should have some beauty to behold.

So, that's it. I just wanted to let you all know... you get a break from checking in here until next Sunday or so... Have a great week and I'll catch up with you all later! Cheers!

Every day just gets better

2006-05-09T17:22:00.000-07:00

Gosh, I'm so happy. Honestly. I feel blessed every day and it feels good! I was at the gym today, listening to a song I used to listen and RELATE to

Have You Seen Me Lately
by The Counting Crows

Get away from me, just get away from me
This isn't gonna be easy
But I don't need you
Believe me

You got a piece of me
But it's just a little piece of me
And I don't need anyone
These days
I feel like I'm fading away

Like sometimes when I hear myself on the radio
Have you seen me lately?
Have you seen me lately?

I was out on the radio starting to change
Somewhere out in America, it's starting to rain
Could you tell me the things you remember
About me
And have you seen me lately?

I remember me
And all the little things that make up a memory
Like she said she loved to watch me sleep
Like she said: "It's the breathing, it's the breathing in and out and in and..."
Have you seen me lately?

I was out on the radio starting to change
Somewhere out in America it's starting to rain
Could you tell me the things you remember
About me
And have you seen me lately?

I thought that someone would notice
I thought somebody would say something
If I was missing
Can't you see me?
Come on color me in
Come on color me in
Give me your blue rain
Give me your black sky
Give me your green eyes
Come on give me your white skin
Come on give me your white skin
Come on give me your white skin

I was out on the radio starting to change
Somewhere out in America, it's starting to rain
Could you tell me the things you remember
About me
And have you seen me lately?
Have you seen me lately

And I thought how different my life is now, how absolutely different I feel and I'm grateful for that. Sometimes I think if I'd actually ended my life the two or three times I thought about it, I wouldn't have been as blessed to have all the amazing things that are happening to me now.

But I digress... We've had houseguests since Saturday night - a lovely couple that we really enjoy. We've been doing the touristy things again - taking the ferry, visiting the Pike Place Market, enjoying the sunshine. They took off for a few days to Vancouver, BC and then Saturday night we leave for our cruise to Alaska! I can't believe it's already here and I'm getting excited about it. We're having phenomenal weather and I can only hope that it stays and travels with us up the coast!

Besides that, it's getting to be that time.... my 20-year high school reunion. I never thought I'd want to go, certainly when I was in high school, I had no desire to see alot of those people again but now there's plenty I want to see. I'm looking forward to it. I've actually contacted a couple people through email, just to find out how they are doing and WHAT they are doing. I'm looking forward to showing M where I grew up as well.

Finally, M got his green card approval today!! Without an interview!!! I guess they do that for some people (I don't know the criteria but we'll take it) and so he should have it sometime next week!! We are thrilled although it doesn't mean much other than he can live here legally, which he was already doing. Hopefully it'll make leaving the country (and coming back) easier. Sigh... it's soooo good! Yay!

A few thoughts on my current situation

2006-05-03T08:49:00.000-07:00

We heard the bun again, a couple days ago. The doc used a doppler to listen to the heartbeat and this time, there it was. Can I say again how cool that is? Especially when I feel so good, so not pregnant, it reminds us when we hear the heartbeat that in another 6 months we're going to have a baby. We still look at each other occasionally and giggle - yes, giggle - because, well probably because we don't know exactly how much it's going to change our lives. Holy shit.

Then I get frustrated because this is the first thing I talk about but it's not the first thing I want people to associate with me. I've been an individual for so long - a friend, a girlfriend, a wife (well, not that long), a skier, a softball player, a traveler, a hiker, a network administrator, a reader, a goofball. I truly don't want my conversation to be focused on the bun and only the bun. Sometimes I have to catch myself and switch the conversation because I've gone on too long. I don't want to dissolve into one of those people whose role as 'mom' becomes their only role. Which isn't to say I'm not somewhat excited about my new role, it's just to say it's not *only* who I am. You know?

K. 'nuff of that. We are dog sitting this week. My friend left her 13-year old retriever with us. Gosh, she's hard work. I think she's been laying on the floor unmoving for the past 2 hours. lol We have to wake her up occasionally to see if she's alive. She's a pet. She won't move if you call her name, you usually have to stamp hard on the floor to get her attention but boy if she doesn't hear the plastic rustling when you open the english muffin bag, or when you are peeling a banana or pouring milk into your coffee. She's right there looking at you, hoping you'll drop something, anything. If you are eating and she's been looking at you for 15 minutes and you haven't looked her way, she'll put her head on your lap and stare up at you. It's a bit disconcerting. But she's 13!! You just can't teach an old dog new tricks, and frankly, we just don't want to. If you give her some of whatever you're eating though, she'll vacuum it in and then look at you for more. It's not like she even tastes it, or appreciates it, or has a bit and leaves you alone. Nope, if you gave her some, she's hoping you'll give her more. Sigh. But we love her to death. We love having her here. I keep hoping for a dog but really, this tired old dog is probably all we need.

Lucky me

2006-04-28T09:35:00.000-07:00

I just returned from my last trip to Southern California (for work, that is). I was lucky enough, in my three days there, to see the lovely Anonymous G again. And her sweet man. They invited me up for a wonderful home cooked meal and we had a great chat. These are good people!

I *did* feel a bit like the John Goodman character in Monsters, Inc though. You know, the big fuzzy monster next to Billy Crystal's little guy? G is so petite - I felt like a serious gargantuan next to her! lol (Sure, it doesn't help being a few months pregnant but I'm not even big yet from that so I have no excuse!) I have to be sure I don't crush her with my hugs when I leave! LOL

Anyhow, that's all I have time for right now. I just wanted to say how happy and blessed I was to get to see her and her hubby again and hope I get to meet the rest of you, sometime and someplace.

We saw the bun!! We saw the bun!!

2006-04-19T15:42:00.000-07:00

I don't know what this looks like to you, but having had the finer points shown to us, it completely looks like a baby bun to us. I had an ultrasound today, just to check out and make things are going okay, and it looks like they are! I see a head and arms and legs and a nose, etc. The bun was moving all over the place (must've been that coffee I had before I went for the u/s) - doing a little dance, so to speak. Irish and I were in awe, dumbstruck. (Well, he was a bit hungover from last night's meeting of the social group we are in, so it could have been something else that was making him pale.... lol) It all feels MUCH more real than it EVER has up to this point... JAY-sus!

Anyhow, other than that, we've had a good week at home. I finally finished one of my contracts (the next finishes next week) and it's a great feeling to finally be done! Now I can play for the whole month of May while our houseguests are here (you may be asking yourself, was she ever actually working? i thought she'd been playing the whole time!). My old boss is looking into hiring me for a permanent position up here - I wouldn't have to travel (my only no-no) - we'll see what happens with that.

Last night we went out with our social group (a local group we met online) and we met an interesting couple who spent last year in Zimbabwe. Is that cool, or what? We had a long chat with them and actually met quite a few other people... It's kind of nice to get to know some people better. Again, I would've loved a glass of wine (just one!) but I enjoyed my virgin bloody mary and my water. really. i did. (oh bun! the sacrifices I do for you! (i know, i know, it's just starting....))

Another day...another dollar....

2006-04-11T16:48:00.000-07:00

Here I am, travelling again, this time in Irvine. Talk about a cultural wasteland! Office building after office building after office building... Still, I'm here for 2 days, teaching my class. My good friend is meeting up with me tonight and we're going out! I'm going to force her to drink margaritas, just because I can't! I'm sure she won't mind.

I'm getting a bit tired of this travelling thing. It's really my fault though. I told my employer I'd only do this contract if I could finish by the end of April. That required me to travel every two weeks. Which in theory doesn't seem too bad, until you're doing it. I wanna be home with my hubby! Waaaah!

Ok, I'm done with that.

The plans have been made. We are taking a cruise to Alaska. I don't know if I mentioned that we are having houseguests in May. Friends from Ireland. They wanted to go to Alaska for a week long cruise and we finally decided to go. I was hesitant since I can't drink... (what if it rains the whole time, what'll I do then??? lol) but I decided we should go. I think it'll be fun and it'll certainly be beautiful. Who knows what we'll do when the bun is born? We might stop travelling. Or not. I might shrivel up and die if we stop travelling. (Let me just note here that travelling for fun and travelling for work are two COMPLETELY different things and while I don't really like travelling for work, travelling for fun is a necessity! I just wanted to clear that up in case you were confused!)

So that's all for now. I'm going to my hotel and I'm going to take a nap before my friend arrives. I promise to write something more interesting next time.